Category Archives: God

I am ENOUGH 

Well folks… it has taken slightly more than seven years and a weekend in a narrow hotel conference room to come to the realization about this blog and my life.  These last seven years have been about feeling like I am never enough and the journey to be enough.  Yup, all these post have been all about me trying to figure out what the f*** is going on from the inside out but my lense was focused from the outside in. 


I was trying to figure out how to be enough, do enough and to truly find fulfilment and meaning while being enough. 

But I was blowing in the wind. 

By others. 

By circumstance. 

By the season. 

Without any reason! 

Two and a half weeks ago, I was sitting in a hotel conference room at a weekend event with my nutritional company and incredible teammates.  (And as you read this you will realize that my business is built on so much more than a brown box of super foods but the super foods were what got it all started three years ago.)

This weekend, for me, was about getting honest with who I really am and how I wanted to show up in the world every single day.   The little sister, the high performance athlete, the mediocre student who wanted to be enough was going to be found that weekend and transformed from the inside out. 

At the beginning of the weekend, I shared how I always felt bad. Really bad! Truly, feeling like I never could be enough to anyone nor myself.   I spoke this out loud.  

I was brave. 

I dove all in. 

I shared my journey. 

Always striving. 

Always seeking. 

Always driving. 

Always trying to figure things out. 

Well folks, I figured it out!  The heavens parted and the light poured in.  I saw this Vision Triad: 


Three sides of a triangle and wham, I had figured it out. 

My identity was broken and a burden to me! I hated myself and who I perceived myself to be through other people’s lenses.  My vision and my purpose have always been strong and joy-filled with thinking about where I want to go with my life and why.  

I am a wife to Sexy Neck and a mama of boys. 

I am a jock. 

I am a wordsmith who loves to play with words and record peoples stories.  

I am a heartfelt friend who is very loyal.  

I am a child of The Father. 

I am a growth junkie.  

I am business builder for the most integral health and wealth company in the world. 

I am a guide in seeing people be set free. 

I am a millionaire who is a reservoir and river of money. 

BUT, why was I feeling held captive and why was I feeling bad all the time? I was missing my identity.  The third corner of my triangle was a crumbled mess focused on broken relationships, performance, perfection, peoples words and never being able to be enough.  

Cue angels signing. 

Cue butterflies fluttering. 

Cue laughing children.  

Cue zoom shot to my face. 

IDENTITY discovered!  Yup, that’s what this smirk is about.  

I found my fulfillment and meaning through many years of playing with words here with you alongside intentional growth all brought together in one weekend. 

What MUST I do in my life? What MUST you do in yours? 

I MUST be with Sexy Neck and my three boys creating magical memories and peaceful, joyful mundane moments.

I MUST express my energy with movement and set goals with a little bit of competition intertwined. Do you want to make a bet on it? Yup, always a competitive jock! 

I MUST share my love of words, my teacher’s mind, my growing mama’s heart by sharing my stories and others. 

I MUST surround myself with likeminded heartfelt friends who are honest and loyal

I MUST remember my ancestry, my scrolls and that I am a child of The Father. 

I MUST always be growing. 
I MUST always share mine and others transformational stories as a business builder for the most integral health and wealth company in the world. How is it possible the same systems can help people release a hundred pounds or gain twenty pounds in lean muscle mass? Yup, that is integrity. 

I MUST help set captives free as I know this former prisoner life. 

I MUST be a multi-millionaire who creates change in the world starting with our family, city, province and country. 

I am a strong, kind, intelligent woman. 

I am a shit disturber. 

I am significant. 

I am valuable to others. 

I am standing. 

I am grateful.  

I am a lighthouse. 

I am a Big Spirit. 

Success is lovely and I am having the time of my life. 

Being free.  

Being enough.  

I am freeeeee! 

I am enough! 

The bathroom mirror at Cafe St. Germain told me too: 


Thank you Rod, Ashley, my fellow Top 50 teammates and especially to Sexy Neck and my brood of boys for giving me grace and enthusiasm to be catapult me into exponential growth.  

✨🙏🏻Glory to God who’s power in us is infinitely more than we can ask or imagine. 

And that’s all folks.  Til we meet again on the other side of being enough. 

With gratitude for this journey with you. This isn’t goodbye, it’s a see ya later alligator. 

Xoxo 😘 Joanna 

I am ENOUGH 

Well folks… it has taken slightly more than seven years and a weekend in a narrow hotel conference room to come to the realization about this blog and my life.  These last seven years have been about feeling like I am never enough and the journey to be enough.  Yup, all these post have been all about me trying to figure out what the f*** is going on from the inside out but my lense was focused from the outside in. 


I was trying to figure out how to be enough, do enough and to truly find fulfilment and meaning while being enough. 

But I was blowing in the wind. 

By others. 

By circumstance. 

By the season. 

Without any reason! 

Two and a half weeks ago, I was sitting in a hotel conference room at a weekend event with my nutritional company and incredible teammates.  (And as you read this you will realize that my business is built on so much more than a brown box of super foods but the super foods were what got it all started three years ago.)

This weekend, for me, was about getting honest with who I really am and how I wanted to show up in the world every single day.   The little sister, the high performance athlete, the mediocre student who wanted to be enough was going to be found that weekend and transformed from the inside out. 

At the beginning of the weekend, I shared how I always felt bad. Really bad! Truly, feeling like I never could be enough to anyone nor myself.   I spoke this out loud.  

I was brave. 

I dove all in. 

I shared my journey. 

Always striving. 

Always seeking. 

Always driving. 

Always trying to figure things out. 

Well folks, I figured it out!  The heavens parted and the light poured in.  I saw this Vision Triad: 


Three sides of a triangle and wham, I had figured it out. 

My identity was broken and a burden to me! I hated myself and who I perceived myself to be through other people’s lenses.  My vision and my purpose have always been strong and joy-filled with thinking about where I want to go with my life and why.  

I am a wife to Sexy Neck and a mama of boys. 

I am a jock. 

I am a wordsmith who loves to play with words and record peoples stories.  

I am a heartfelt friend who is very loyal.  

I am a child of The Father. 

I am a growth junkie.  

I am business builder for the most integral health and wealth company in the world. 

I am a guide in seeing people be set free. 

I am a millionaire who is a reservoir and river of money. 

BUT, why was I feeling held captive and why was I feeling bad all the time? I was missing my identity.  The third corner of my triangle was a crumbled mess focused on broken relationships, performance, perfection, peoples words and never being able to be enough.  

Cue angels signing. 

Cue butterflies fluttering. 

Cue laughing children.  

Cue zoom shot to my face. 

IDENTITY discovered!  Yup, that’s what this smirk is about.  

I found my fulfillment and meaning through many years of playing with words here with you alongside intentional growth all brought together in one weekend. 

What MUST I do in my life? What MUST you do in yours? 

I MUST be with Sexy Neck and my three boys creating magical memories and peaceful, joyful mundane moments.

I MUST express my energy with movement and set goals with a little bit of competition intertwined. Do you want to make a bet on it? Yup, always a competitive jock! 

I MUST share my love of words, my teacher’s mind, my growing mama’s heart by sharing my stories and others. 

I MUST surround myself with likeminded heartfelt friends who are honest and loyal

I MUST remember my ancestry, my scrolls and that I am a child of The Father. 

I MUST always be growing. 
I MUST always share mine and others transformational stories as a business builder for the most integral health and wealth company in the world. How is it possible the same systems can help people release a hundred pounds or gain twenty pounds in lean muscle mass? Yup, that is integrity. 

I MUST help set captives free as I know this former prisoner life. 

I MUST be a multi-millionaire who creates change in the world starting with our family, city, province and country. 

I am a strong, kind, intelligent woman. 

I am a shit disturber. 

I am significant. 

I am valuable to others. 

I am standing. 

I am grateful.  

I am a lighthouse. 

I am a Big Spirit. 

Success is lovely and I am having the time of my life. 

Being free.  

Being enough.  

I am freeeeee! 

I am enough! 

The bathroom mirror at Cafe St. Germain told me too: 


Thank you Rod, Ashley, my fellow Top 50 teammates and especially to Sexy Neck and my brood of boys for giving me grace and enthusiasm to be catapult me into exponential growth.  

✨🙏🏻Glory to God who’s power in us is infinitely more than we can ask or imagine. 

And that’s all folks.  Til we meet again on the other side of being enough. 

With gratitude for this journey with you. This isn’t goodbye, it’s a see ya later alligator. 

Xoxo 😘 Joanna 

Be Living in a Beautiful State

My thoughts are mine.

My motive does matter.

I manage my state. 

To create a beautiful place. 

Energy. 

Flow.

Holy Spirit is what I know. 

God’s the man who creates this flow. 

This energy. 

This place.

This greatness I know. 

He guides my steps. 

The people who cross. 

The ones I speak into. 

The ones who speak into me. 

Making me free. 

Like the wind through a tree. 

Bending and moving.  

In summer and winter. 

Providing shade and light  

Throughout this groaning earth.  

Free to roam.

To find my home.

Within.

Without anything missing.

As I live in state.

In this beautiful place.

Within.

Every day of my life.

NOTE: With gratitude for Tony Robbins whose divine wisdom has changed the path of my life.  My mind and spirit are truly free to create this beautiful state that is unique to me.  No shame. No guilt. No justification.  No excuses.  Just 100% completely free to be me.

IMG_2277[1]

Be Getting Messy 

God embraces mess.I embrace mess. 

M

E

S

S


Look at the tree branches. 

How moss grows 

And water flows. 
Look at the mess. 

No straight lines.  

Only curves and twists. 

It is so enchanting! 

Mesmerizing. 

Keep looking deep within. 

Feel the mess inside. 


No more perfection. 

No more square corners. 

No more self-imposed rules.   
Colourful. 

Colouring outside the lines. 

Broken crayons. 

Using what I have. 

Where I am. 

Amongst the mess. 

Beautifying.  

Being open to the flow. 

Freedom to go. 

Where I don’t know. 

Embracing the mess! 

Be Having a New View 

When do you feel your knees shake or your mouth turn to sandpaper?  What makes your mind spin with emotionally charged random thoughts? 

For me, up until today, it was that building with the gigantic H on the top of it. Yessiree Bob, the hospital. 

Knee shaking. 

Sandpaper mouth. 

Mind blowing. 

Emotional muscle building hospital. 

I walked through seven years, um I mean days, of hospital time with my mom exactly three and a half years ago. If you followed my blog back then you know this meant pain, excruciating pain, worried nurses who thought they were going to kill my mom with pain meds, a stolen chair, sleeping on said chair and a final ambulance ride in the snow with my mama to the incredible hospice house. 

Hell 

Healing.  

Stretching. 

Restoring. 


Today, I walked into the hospital to see another dearly beloved family member.  I didn’t want to go, but my peeps are so much more important than any discomfort that I may feel.  I put on my armour, remembered what I learned in my last journey and walked through the doors.  

Walked through the doors with a “New View”, knowing that I had experiences that could help, a story that could support others and the keen sense to find tea, be in the right place at the right time and know the questions to ask when that magic right time happens. 

Shit, I have learned something and grown into it!  

I walked through the valley of he shadow of death, embraced it, rowed the waves of grief through it and now I can see the sun! I can see hope!  I can see a completely New View.  

Standing strong. 

Calm, steady words. 

Mind calming. 

Emotional muscle built hospital. 

The gift of grief keeps on giving and will for the rest of my life. My mom’s life and death had been one of my greatest teachers.  It brought me to my knees and helped me learn to stand.  Let this five all my fellow grief journeyers hope.  

Standing in my truth. 

With my experience. 

Soaring in my gifts. 

With my journey. 

Soaking in my New View. 


With love and gratitude for all that I can do and share. This post is dedicated to a beautiful couple who are our role models and the hospital that is supporting them in their journey. 

Be Learning About Shame/Guilt 

Brene Brown is the shame expert in our generation, but I want to add my two sense as shame has been my game for most of my life.  I have been shamed, shamed others and watch people shame.  It’s powerful emotion and one that can be used as a tool to destroy! 

Your spirit.  

Your belief in yourself. 

Your belonging.  

Your being.  

First, let’s talk about the difference between shame and guilt to get this emotional, mindset roller coaster rolling down the track.  


For me, the difference between shame and guilt involves the external versus the internal.  Have you every had anyone ‘put’ something on you, that’s most likely shame.  My most recent example was when someone criticized what I said during a conversation they overheard and then, without me asking for feedback, they told me what I ‘should’ have done.  When I get ‘should’ on, I know it’s shame.   Someone is trying to tell you what to do and wielding the shame sword to get you to do it.    My father recently told me that “I thought mom and I had brought you up better than that.” Yup, I am 43 years old and that is called good ‘old’ shame.  

No should.  

Just could.  

No shame.  

Just guilt.  

No swords. 

Just freedom.  

Guilt for me is a super power that comes from within.  It moves you to deeper places.  It helps you grow.  It’s the feeling inside, “Oh, I could have done that!”  You realize your mistake and seek answers to make it better for next time.  It completely happens within.  It could have been triggered by an external event or conversation but no one ‘put’ anything on you.  It’s 100% coming from you.  This happened recently with something I ate.  I felt guilty afterwards because it wasn’t fueling my body but instead was feeding an emotion.  My guilt allowed me to move into a new place thinking about fuel versus feeling foods.  

Your spirit. 

Your belief in yourself. 

Your belonging.  

Your being.  

Free to live your life.  

Free to make mistakes. 

Free to listen within. 

Everyone living without shame ‘put’on each other.  

Free to get off the shame roller coaster.  

Free to step aboard the guilt train. 

Be Free.  

Be Enough.  

Be Searching for Something 

As I sit watching the sunset, I ponder that ‘something’ I search for.   That ‘something’ that will fill feelings of grief, sadness and overwhelm.  

That space that I try to fill every time I open my phone to check Facebook. 

The hole I avoid when I run away from what I am feeling.  

The darkness I turn from every time I sit in numbness, not wanting to feel, not wanting to go down old trodden paths of pain.

But sometimes life doesn’t give us a chance to avoid.  

It allows us the privilege to sit up, to notice, to see our grief journey clearly and how much pain we have turned into gratitude.  

This search for something that is really nothing outside of us at all. 

We can’t avoid living life and why would we want to. 

The privilege to be with our people, to see into the eyes of their souls and to get to know them on a deeper level. 

Yes, Facebook could do that. 

Walking away could help us reflect. 

And that darkness I talked about, well, that only helps us see the brightness of the light.  

See, I have learned to let go of my sense of judgement as things are neither good nor bad, they just are.  I have also learned to be present with what I am feeling, as these feelings are neither good nor bad, as well, they just are! 


So, as you search for that ‘something’ today may you first look within your soul, your beautiful unique self sitting within you.  Resting in your spirit.  

Being you! 

Then may you look around you at those imperfectly perfect people around you. Building Knex, asking about the birds and the bees, reading books, playing with pillows… are what my people are currently doing. 

Being them! 


Search for that something that is already within you. 

Beautiful.  

Imperfectly perfect. 

Neither good nor bad. 

Just being. 

Full of strength.  

Overflowing with hope.  

Sitting in the presence of His peace.  

Knowing you are loved.  

Searching for nothing. 

Found! 

*written for a special person in our life on this significant ‘something’ kind of day! 

Be Leaving a Legacy 

Words often can’t do moments justice, except maybe if you are an Inuit person who has fifty words to describe snow. 

Today, I had an incredible moment where my mom showed her heart and the legacy that she has left myself, my boys, her family and her friends.  I pray that my words will do this moment justice.  

Since my mom died three years ago, there are a few memory making places that I haven’t been back to because of circumstances or choice.  The beautiful Cottage Day Spa with the extraordinary human being, Pam, was one of those places I chose not to go.  The Cottage Day Spa holds a very special place in my heart as it is a place where my mom felt peace and was truly cared for, in body, mind and spirit.   Pam has a gift to share and a beautiful Cottage to share it in.  


For my mom’s last birthday, I planned an elaborate surprise birthday party including a limousine scavenger hunt, poster collage, brunch at her favourite restaurant and an afternoon with Pam at The Cottage for a facial.  

Jump forward three years and I hadn’t made an appointment to see Pam. Before Christmas of this year, was when I ran into Pam for the first time.  I hadn’t seen her in years.  I then ran into Pam a second time in the parking lot of our ski hill about a month ago and I knew it was time to go back for a visit. 

Today, I stepped into The Cottage Day Spa.  The memories of coming with my mom enveloped me. She was always so full of joy coming here.  Truly free and truly happy. Today, I was shocked when I sat down and Pam pulled out this note from my file: 


Before my mom died, she paid for my treatment today! Pam honoured my mom’s legacy gift to me from over three years ago and today I was given the most relaxing, kind, beautiful, mom-inspired facial.  

Legacy. 

Living legacy.  

Loving. 

Learning.  

Giving.  

Thoughtful.  

Kind. 

My mom’s legacy.  

What will you be leaving as a legacy through your thoughts and deeds? 

My hope is to leave a legacy of:

✨ My love of ALL people. 

✨ Being a river of money, constantly supporting and passing on. 

✨ Home being a place of peace and joy. 

✨ My desire to be strong and athletic.  

✨ My moments of creativity and inspiration through solitary actions of writing, painting and photography. 

✨ My gratitude for God’s divine moments in our lives woven through people, greatness, mistakes and living imperfectly perfect.  

My legacy. 

My mom’s legacy.  

My inheritance.  

My heart interwoven through her constant encouragement and presence in our lives. 

Forever and always. 

Amen. 

Be Finding Forward

Forward.

Moving not backwards.

Forwards.

Moving in a direction.

Which one will we choose?

Moving from the west to the east.

Finding the dance that takes you forward.

Into your dreams.

Into your spirit.

Into your spidey sense.

Presence.

How does one stay present?

Moving forward?

This is what I have learned and this is what propels me forward.

Taking peeks into the tiny, narrow, rear view mirror to pour gratitude into where I came from.

Gratitude.

Love.

Letting go.

be-finding-forward

Looking straight-forward into my large, expansive windshield watching the exciting places I am going.

Joy.

Peace.

Light.

Eyes, wide open, looking for the gold thread of hope woven throughout my day.

Holding my empty hands of faith.

God’s goodness poured out over all our lives.

Into my hands.

Will we choose to look for it?

Will we choose to have open hands to receive it?

Moving forwards.

Dancing the dance of my life.

Trusting.

Fun.

Faith.

Forward.

Smooch, Joanna

Be on a Negativity Fast and Positivity Feast 

I have learned how to cleanse. 

I love the freedom it brings my mind and body! 

I have previously fasted from Facebook, sugar and books. 

I loved the awareness that it brought. 

And when I heard about a negativity fast and positivity feast for 40 days of Lent, I felt like this was the best idea yet! 

I love the possibilities that this will bring. 

I believe that every word that I speak and write has power, seen and unseen. 

I believe that one person, me, can change the world around me by being positive in thought and mind. 

I believe that if I am intentional about being positive, I will find positive!  

Anyone want to bite off a huge chunk of positivity and feast with me for the next forty days?  

Here is what Igniting Hope Ministries talks about during this season:  

    
 Let’s all take a big chunk of positivity in uses well as through us and watch what will happen!  
This post is inspired by the incredible work Igniting Hope Ministries does affecting the seen and unseen world.