Be Celebrating Your Mom’s Birthday 

Last year, it was lemon meringue cake, dinner as a family and sending balloons up to Nana in heaven.

This year, it is receiving a beautiful phone call from my mom’s friend’s Donna and Wendy, a morning text from Sexy Neck and a great friend in KCity plus I took an afternoon bike ride.  



It is tears.  

It is joy.  

It is shattering grief and living life all wrapped up in pieces of mom’s birth day.  

I don’t know how to do any of this!  

How does one celebrate a day that they’ve always celebrated with a woman that they love celebrating when that woman is no longer with you? 

So, I bike. 

I sit.  

I cry.  

I look at reminders, especially this one I created one month ago that reminds me of the great roots my parents gave me.  



The waves of grief no longer pushes me underwater until I can’t breathe, but I am still on the boat, rowing in this grief, learning about myself and filled with deep gratitude for how present, wonderful and loving my mom was.  

I wish I could get a piece of that back! 

Be Savouring Sunsets 

Spring break. 

Done.  

Sunsets savoured.  

Tasted.  

Touched.  

Danced through.  

Played under.  

Sunsets. 

I first began my love affair with sunsets as an university student.  I moved from the mountains to the prairies to go to school and watching the sun slip off the earth mesmerized me.  

Captured.  

Stopped in my tracks.  

My propulsion moving me endlessly forward was halted.  

Breath taken. 

By brilliant colours.  

Chasing the sun setting.  

The sun has shown me its incredible force.  

Bringing light.  

Hope for a new day.  

A peaceful ending to moments made.  

Creating warmth.  

Thank you God for the sun and sunsets. 

We now have three boys who savour sunsets.  

Here they are enjoying a stopped moment savouring the sunset on our last day of spring break holidays.

Did anyone notice the sunrise shot I threw in?  Tee hee, cheeky monkey I am!

Lastly, I have been cleaning out old junk/treasures and I can across this poem I wrote in grade seven: 

I love how God weaves together themes for me.  

Be Getting Hammered on your Holidays 

Hammered had a different connotations in my twenties and thirties.  Now that I am forty, being hammered has entailed waves and a flu virus. 

Last year, Sexy Neck received the gift of a pair of ripped shorts courtesy of the waves in Waimea Bay.  

Today, Waimea Bay gave Sexy Neck the gift of a shirt and face full of sand.  

Here are Papa and Sexy-Neck surveying the surf pre-hammering. 



Before. 



And after.  (He is happy the waves didn’t take his sun glasses!)

The wee boys had an incredible morning of boogie boarding.   I guess it is easier to ride a board then stand in a wave. 





Even OC got into the waves, but I only managed thus post-water shot. 



We are recovering from getting hammered with the flu this week.  

Fever.  

Chills.  

Cough.  

Running noses.

Sleepless nights.  

And this is the only hammering we hope to have during this spring break.  

Riding the waves.  

In the water.  

In life.  

Recovering from illness.  

Rejoicing in health. 

Good. 

Bad. 

Sand up your shorts. 

Sun on your face. 

Getting hammered.  

Be Reading Signs 

I haven’t laughed so hard… 

My dad and Sexy Neck were in the front of the van yesterday.  The road we were heading north on was closed due to a traffic accident.   



We spent over an hour on a road trip that could have taken twenty minutes, but oh was it a hilarious trip.  

Dad and Sexy Neck were on the top of their game reading EVERY SINGLE SIGN WE PASSED!   Have you ever noticed that ‘older’ men tend to do this?  I had NEVER noticed until I heard Sexy Neck explaim from the front seat, 

“I am officially ‘old’.  I am reading signs out loud as I drive. And they aren’t important signs.” 



Hahaha!  

Simple times.  

Out of routine.  

Shaking it up.

Sharing insight.  

Doing ‘normal’ things.  

Off to enjoy some pineapple… 



Be Treading Water 

When you’re in the middle of the ocean, when you can’t seem to find a place to set your foot or something to grab onto, the best thing you can do is just tread water.



Keep your head up. 

Kick your legs.  

Move your arms around and around and around.

It’s pretty hard to notice the beautiful bird that flies by or the duck-shaped cloud above your head when you’re treading water. You can’t see the beautiful turtle swimming underneath you.  

It’s also difficult to have the person treading water beside you telling you what to do or give feedback.

The very best thing you can do, is just be with them. 

Try to find a rhythm. 

Ask God to be with your friend.  

Try to encourage them. 

Ask God to help you. 

Try to deal with your own thing you have going on.

Most of us are treading water in our daily lives.  

Over scheduled.  

Stretched in our finances and head over heals in debt. 

Always striving for more and better.  

No time to be with your chosen partner in a meaningful way, as the details of life almost push you over. 

Unable to attend to your children’s  needs because imagine how hard it is to tread water with a child holding onto you? 

We are really unable to do or see anything except the water enveloping us.  

I have treaded water during my November midterms in my first year of University.   To say that I coasted through high school, would be a mild understatement.  

I barely had my head above water my first year of teaching in a wonderful country school one hour away from my home.  

My body and mind were working hard when I had our firstborn son and caught mastitis.  I now joke that this should be a weapon of mass distraction.  Forget bombs, mastitis would level the strongest man.  

And now I have just come out of a season of treading water in the waves of grief.  A year and a half ago we moved cities, the day after this move my mom was diagnosed with cancer and we watched her die five months later.  Many relationships I had also died during this season. 

Now, I can finally really see and feel what is going on around me.  Isn’t hindsight wonderfully freeing? 

I now feel very deeply for those I see treading water around me.  

I don’t have much to offer but I do know what has helped me.  

Let go of the non-essentials.   What do you really need in your life? 

Lean in to those who love you.  Who accepts you for who you are and love you unconditionally?  

Hold on to memories made and to be made.   Can you look at old photos or picture a future holiday in your mind? 

Move you body in some way every day.  What gets your heart beating and legs moving? 

Eat to be fit, not for feelings.   Do you like to stuff your feelings with food?  I did and it didn’t make me feel any better.  

Hold on.  

Strap yourself in.  

God is the ‘Life preserver’. 

Ask Him for help, for wisdom and for guidance on the path of life. 

You are not alone.  

You were wonderfully created. 

In the messiness of life, your imperfect ways are a gift.  

Let go of perfection.  

Let go of the vision that your home will look like an one hour fixer-up reality tv show and your body like the cover of a magazine.  This is not real life! 

Give what you can.  

Be where you are.  

Be who you are. 

Be enough.  

One.  

Day.  

At. 

A. 

Time.  

Be Wondering About Words 

Why are people mean and rude?

Short with words and sometimes crude?
Why do we decide to speak this way? 
Without compassion with what we say?  
How does the tongue twist and hurt? 
It can make anyone feel like dirt? 
Why do we withhold our words sometime? 
While other days they are like a chime? 
Words can be cruel. 
Make me look like a fool. 
They can lift someone up.  
Even make me spill my cup.  
Sweet sentences to soothe my ears.  
Little ditties to give me the gears.  
How I love to play with words!
Let’s use them to build up, anything else is absurd.  

Building.  
Building up.  
Built. 
Built up.  
With words. 
Don’t be absurd.  
You turd.