Category Archives: blogger

author, blogger, Boys, Education, homeschooling

Be Lacking Socialization in Home Learning

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The biggest question that I get as a home-based learning parent and teacher is: “How is your child going to learn to be socialized outside of a campus school setting?” This genuine, heartfelt and often “worry-filled” question from many people close to us always comes from a place that we are ‘lacking’ socialization in home-based learning. My most recent question about socializing my kids came while sitting in a dentist waiting room. It had me pondering what does socializing mean and what do we actually do to “socialize” the boys. This is a long one, and may shock some, so strap yourselves in folks!

According to Merriam-Webster we have two definitions of “socialization” that fit for this question:

  1. “The process, beginning during childhood, by which individuals acquire the values, habits, and attitudes of a society
  2. “Social interaction with others”

After being at the receiving end of this question for over five years, I now want to laugh out loud, but I don’t because I know that this question comes from a lack of understanding on what home-based learning looks like.

Do we believe that children can be socialized best, “acquiring the values, habits and attitude of society”, by being in a classroom with the same teacher with their same gifts/talents plus the same 30 students for ten months a year for 6 hours per day? *******Remember: These children and their families often have no say with whom their children will share their days with.

Okay then Joanna, how is your child going to learn to be socialized outside of a campus school setting? I simply respond with sharing that I believe that children are best socialized when they are interacting with many ages and generations of people with variegated ideas and passions. Imagine having many “teachers”, on a daily basis, that have assorted gifts? I am going to share what our family currently did for learning activities “beyond the books” and online programs that add to their “socialization” that many people around us are worried about. Strap yourself in, as even I am shocked at what I realized my boys experience on a weekly/monthly basis for “socialization”.

SIDENOTE: Please carefully remember that because my children don’t sit in a classroom all day and have to “live by someone else’s schedule”, we can truly create the schedule that is unique to them, their abilities and their energy levels. They have more “time” throughout their days to do the activities that I am listing plus more downtime to read on the couch, sit in the yard, climb trees and play random games of tennis, soccer, basketball… Learning happens from waking until they go to bed twelve months of the year. Home-based learning is the term that I often use, as home is the base, but learning can and does happen everywhere we go. The ADDED BONUS in this home-based learning lifestyle is that the boys can sleep in when they are tired and we also don’t hesitate to change our schedule or skip things, if they feel a cold coming on or simply need a break.

Here are our list of activities where opportunities for “socialization” occur during this current season (Spring, 2023):

Grade 10 Son’s Activities:

  • Goes to campus school every second day
  • Trampoline gymnastics 3 x per week
  • Trampoline competitions 5 x per year
  • Chiropractor 1 x per month
  • Physiotherapy 4 x per year
  • Ultimate frisbee team 3 x per week
  • Soccer referee 1 x per week
  • Helps our neighbour in her yard 1 x per week
  • Drivers training and classes 1 x per for 8 weeks
  • Talks to our other neighbour about what he is building/doing 1-2 x per week
  • Video editing and making movies (Learning from Youtubers)
  • Play VR with a home learning friend 1 x per week
  • Walk the dog and run into random people
  • Go to his brothers’ activities 3 x per week
  • Dinner/visits/activities with friends 2 x per week

Grade 8 Son’s Activities:

  • Taekwondo 3 x per week
  • Taekwondo events 2 x per year
  • Soccer 2 x per week
  • Soccer Referee 2 x per week
  • Voice/Music lessons 1 x per week
  • Talk to our neighbour about what he is building/doing 1-2 x per week
  • Swimming lessons set
  • Youth Group
  • Speech therapy 1 x per week
  • Tutoring 1 x per week
  • Occupational Therapy 1 x every 2 weeks
  • Physiotherapy 1 x per month
  • Orthodontist 1 x every six weeks
  • Visit the public library 1 x per week
  • Walk the dog and run into random people
  • Go to his brothers’ activities 3 x per week
  • Hangout with a neighbour 1 x per month
  • Dinner/visits/activities with friends 2 x per week

Grade 6 Son’s Activities:

  • Taekwondo 2 x per week
  • Soccer 2 x per week
  • Trumpet lessons 1 x per week
  • Take mail over to our neighbours 1 x per month
  • Drawing/Cartooning class 1 x per week
  • Grass volleyball league 2 x per week
  • Visit the public library 1 x per week
  • Talk to our neighbour about what he is building/doing 1-2 x per week
  • Swimming lessons set
  • Walk the dog and run into random people
  • Go to his brothers’ activities 3 x per week
  • Dinner/visits/activities with friends 2 x per week

This doesn’t include other arbitrary visits with people in the grocery store, when we give friends a ride home, someone comes to the front door and the hours of conversation that we have as a family eating dinner every night together, pouring love onto each of the boys’ lives, building them up, coaching them individually, working through problems and simply being a perfectly imperfect family. We are truly blessed.

If you are personally worried about the socialization of a home-based learning student, ask them: “What do your days look like?”

Many home learning families have more time for interactions with their extended family that adds richness and value and others, like us, bring in ‘experts’ from the community around them with their unique talents to pour into their children. Every family’s learning schedule is unrepeatable and socialization opportunities are truly unfathomable. What our kids experience on a daily basis could never be repeated inside a campus classroom.

If after reading this blog post and talking with your home-based learning friends/ family members you are still personally worried about the socialization, I would turn this worry into the socialization that is happening with a campus setting. We are grateful to be “skipping” many of the social behaviours that are happening in the middle school years in our community.

The moments are endless for home-based learning young people, learning outside the constraints of a campus building, with a schedule that is designed personally designed for them. This isn’t a lifestyle of learning for everyone, but it is for anyone who has the desire and time plus wants to learn from a variety of people with a variety of gifts all year long.

Have a sunny Saturday and love what you do.

xoxo Joanna

P.S. Can anyone tell that my boys were at camp this week? 3 posts in 3 days. I really missed them a ton and enjoyed the time to ponder and think.

author, blogger, Family, finance, Flexibility, home learning, Parenting, Wordsmith

Be Compartmentalizing your Life

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When I was a ten years old, I remember lining up at the Scotia bank in Spruceland strip mall with my dad on Friday afternoons so that he could get cash for the weekend before the bank closed. This is such a vivid memory that I can even remember some of the clothes I was wearing when I went and some of conversations we had with people as we lined up (weekend fishing trips, accidents that happened in the bush, local hockey scores…).

When was the last time you lined up or were at the bank in person?

This week?

Last week?

A month ago?

A year ago?

I am genuinely curious. Would you let me know?

My bet is that you are like me and you are checking your banking online at home, scanning in any cheques you receive and receiving and sending e-transfers rather than going to the physical bank building. And this story about banking is exactly why I want to talk about “compartmentalizing your life”.

(Sidenote: I am actually speaking to myself about this topic, but I thought you would all like to be a part of my musings and unconnected thoughts and personal stories as I connect them.)

August 1st, 2023, I am starting on a new teaching/work adventure and right now I am dialing in my schedule and thinking about what I do during each day that I really need to account for and compartmentalized. I am not only thinking of every single thing that I do throughout my day in person, but also what I am doing online. My brain hurts a bit. Have you ever tried to account for everything you do within a week?

My first stop on this brain train has started with banking. I do banking throughout my days as bills arrive, as e-transfer requests come through and check our banking regularly as money moves in and out of our account monthly. Banking is now moving over to Sexy Neck. Boom shakalaka. He now has a handy-dandy chart with everything that regularly moves in and out of our account plus a lovely storage system for the boys and I to use to place the bills. Viola, first stop done.

My second stop has been around regular house cleaning. What currently happens around our house, well until yesterday, is that I do cleaning during the weekdays so that we don’t spend the evenings and weekends doing this chore. What did I do with this gargantuan list? I hired a cleaner. Yup, I did. This goes back to my first year of teaching when we had our beautiful friend Faye clean for us. It was such a gift. I decided to take on a few extra students and give myself the gift of a clean home every two weeks. Write a Student Learning Plan and report cards or clean? I am choosing SLP’s and report cards any day of the week!

My last stop as I have gone down this list making exercise to compartmentalize what I do in my day-to-day life involves redefining the blue (Sexy Neck) and pink (mine) jobs in our lives as parents as we raise three amazing young men into adulthood. (It makes me incredibly happy-sad that our oldest is graduating in two years!!) At one of our weekly chats, Sexy Neck and I sat down and redid this list from over five years ago. The blue/pink job list now sits proudly on the fridge. I know what things I am taking care of and he knows what he’s doing. We always try to help each other out, which is a beautiful thing, but when we are in the busy seasons that happen in the magnificent world of education, we can always fall back on this list to keep things running smoothly.

Banking.

Cleaning.

Parenting jobs.

Compartmentalizing these three things so that I can find space to add a 28 hour work-week into our home learning, dog walking, movement loving family!

Have a fabulous Friday folks and love what you do.

xoxo Joanna

blogger, homeschooling, school, teaching, Wordsmith

Be Praying for Yourself

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When I started praying for the leadership of our school two years ago, I never knew that I would end up praying for myself.

On the post-it-note on my computer monitor I wrote:

🙏🏻 Wisdom

🙏🏻 Hope

🙏🏻 God to fill in the gap

🙏🏻 Encouragement/Strength

🤩 JOY

(Those that know me know that I LOVE post-it-notes.)

Yesterday, it became public knowledge that I will be starting a new job this summer. I will be the HCOS Regional Administrator for the NORTH! (Kind of like a Vice Principal in the campus system, but different because I teach and work in the virtual world of home learning.)

Yes, you heard it and no, we aren’t moving. I will be supporting and serving the teachers and families working and living in the north from our house here in KCity, but then travelling up north a few times per year for meetings and events. This northern girl will have part of her heart back in the north because of her beautiful work!

Who loves a good northern road trip? MEEEEEEEEE!

Williams Lake, Prince George, Tumbler Ridge, Burns Lake, Terrace, Dawson Creek, Fort St. John and wherever else I am lead to go… watch out, I am coming for a visit and most likely bringing the boys too! Isn’t it cool that I can bring my boys to work as well. My school truly loves and support families, including my own.

This is really the best of learning and teaching in all ways!

New job coming soon: August 1st, 2023

Have a super duper uper Saturday and love what you do.

xoxo Joanna

author, blogger, encouragement, psychology, writing

Be Wondering Why I Wrote My May 28th, 2023 Blog Post?

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In the wake of what I wrote on May 28th, 2023, I have had many, many people reach out via phone call, messenger and text to express their shock at what I shared about my mental and physical journey the last few years.

Yes, I am strong, but I am also a sponge. I feel things deeply.

Yes, I am a good listener, but I am also not great at sharing what I am experiencing. I feel things deeply.

Yes, I am realizing that I need to create a circle of support where I can be seen and heard. I feel things deeply.

Yes, I am one thousand million percent grateful that I wrote what I did and shared what I went through. I know that I truly shocked some of you, but I think it really reminds us that these last few years haven’t been easy for many people, whichever side of the “fence” you chose to be on. I wrote this post and had it sitting in my “drafts” for a few weeks, but I decided to publish it for three groups of people.

First, this last autumn season we had two very remarkable young woman living in K-City, one was my niece and the other was Bubba’s daughter, my oldest friend in the world’s daughter. It was such a special time to have them here. When I wrote this post, I thought of them and our three boys. Perhaps one of them will stumble on to this when they need it the most. I hope my sharing will help them is some small way.

I never wrote this post because I needed help right now or I wanted something from someone or I wanted to bring shame or guilt onto anyone else. My message was simply to help one other person, either now or in the future when someone stumbles upon that blog. One beloved friend wrote to me a few days after my blog: “I just wanted to say a huge thank-you for sharing your last post on Be Enough about re-claiming your health (mental and physical)…. Basically all you have been through and how you’ve described it is EXACTLY how I’ve felt the past 3 years.”. The second reason was simply to help one person feel less alone!

Lastly, I was also thinking of all the young people who have committed suicide these last three years. (And no, suicide was never an option or thought for me personally, but my darkest moments made me think about the hopelessness people must feel when they attempt or commit suicide.) Every day in Canada 11 people commit suicide and 200 people attempt it. Did you know that 75% of the people who commit suicide are male? The saddest part for me as I learned about suicide rates in our beautiful and “in need of healing” country was this rate is rising, not going down, with everything we know about mental health.

I wonder what would happen is more of us shared our stories, without worrying about judgement of being labelled or worrying about being put into a box or then having people try to “fix” us. I wonder if people were exactly where they are, when they are, how they are what our communities would look like?

And that’s all for this Thursday folks. Love what you do!

xoxo Joanna

blogger, Education, Family, Grief, Teaching, Wordsmith

Be Framing Your Job with One Thought

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 My one thought about my job today: I can be replaced in a minute.  The leadership of my school is so remarkable, I could probably be replaced in less than a minute.

Yes, it’s true for me and for you.  No one is irreplaceable in their work.

I recognized this shortly after my mom died and I fully grasped that she was truly irreplaceable.

Gone forever.

Never to be replaced.

Yes, we have had phenomenal people “fill in the vast gap” my mom left, but no one can restore her place in our lives as a mom and super nana.

A job is a unique arena of life as we all need to find ways to house and feed ourselves, but this great loss made me understand the temporality of work and life.

This morning, I am interviewing for a new job for the next school year. I am taking this mentality into my interview and I feel free.

Free to ponder.

Free to choose.

Free to open the door and see if this new opportunity will help me be a better wife, mom, friend, teacher and human being living on this earth.

Free to live!

So folks, as you ponder this next year ahead of you, what would you change if you knew you could be replaced in your job tomorrow, but never be replaced as a mother, father, daughter, brother, sister, cousin…?

Here temporarily.

Never to be replaced within your “family”.

Have an epic Tuesday and love what you do.

xoxo Joanna

blogger, radical sabbatical, Wordsmith

Be Astounded by Top-Down Wipers

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I was 49 and 3 days years old when my son pointed out a Lexus with a back wiper that came down from the top.

Astounding.

Revolutionary.

Mind blowing.

Why don’t all wipers come down from the top?

The wiper was hidden up at the top under the overhang of the car. I didn’t even notice it! It wiped away the equal amount of the window as a wiper coming from the bottom, so why don’t all cars have this?

Imagine scraping the snow off the window in the winter without a wiper to contend with at the bottom?

Imagine not having that back wiper sticking out to grab onto an oversize sweater you are wearing?

Imagine less wear and tear on the wiper as it doesn’t sit in the snow/rain/hail/sun every single day?

I am guessing in the next few years that every single car will have a back wiper that comes down from the top, unless someone can tell me some negatives from this really revolutionary idea.

And that’s my random thought from this week.

Have a sunny, relaxing Sunday and love what you do.

xoxo Joanna

blogger, Grief, life, love, Self-help

Be Leaning Into Pain and Moving Towards Pleasure

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I have had quite a few lessons in life where I have had to lean into pain. How about you? Any pain coursing through your body and mind these days?

As a 15 year old, I had a very close friend who decided to hangout with older friends that partied, smoked and drank. I had to literally walk away from her as we discovered we no longer had anything in common as I pursued my athletic goals and knew that health was my future. It’s painful to lose people who you have been friends with you for years.

As a 21 year old, I was injured in my third year of university volleyball. Right after I hoisted the cup as the captain of my university team declaring we were the best team in Canada, I had to make a choice. I made a very painful decision to retire from volleyball after deciding not to do a surgery with a questionable outcome.

As a 39 year old, I grieved deeply as we moved from Vernon to Kelowna. I said goodbye to my parents living ten minutes away. We lost the routine of preschool pick-up seeing friends who had known us since before we had kids and having the beautiful Vernon Music School and the “Peanut” park just down the road. No longer could we drive 25 minutes up the hill to be at both world class downhill and cross country skiing.

Now in 2023, I am watching quite a few people in pain around me right now: Dealing with deaths, or divorces or illnesses or poor choices by those around them or …. just plain and simple pain.

What I want to say friends is: LEAN IN! Lean fully into the pain. I don’t believe that ignoring it, drinking it away, binge watching netflix or not fully acknowledging pain helps us as human beings in any way. Denial and distraction don’t really help us move through the pain. These two D’s help us get stuck!

Right now, we are personally having to lean into some pain, some uncomfortableness and a lot of uncertainty. I know that leaning into these feelings will help us move towards pleasure and not make any rash decision based on pain.

Not one single decision based on the pain we have experienced have been good ones.

Lean into the pain, then seek the pleasure and run towards it.

Sit against that wall in the darkness and feel that pain going through your body and then know the sunshine of pleasure will be just around the corner.

I have experienced it.

I know it.

I choose it!

Lean into the pain.

Feel it.

Soak in it.

Feel.

Deal.

Heal.

Then you will be able to truly make a decision based out of pleasure and not pain with the added bonus that you won’t make any rash or “bad” decision based on that pain alone, like we have done in the past!

Now, go have an epic Thursday and love what you do!

xoxo Joanna

blogger, Education, mindset, Teaching

Be on a 450 Day Streak with Duolingo

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Schönen donnerstag

Today marks the day where I have been logging into the Duolingo App to practice my German for 450 days in a row. Almost 15 months of daily practice for at least 5 minutes that has moved me through 23 different lessons on various topics in German. One restriction with my practice is that I have the free account and thus only have “five hearts” per day to work through my lessons. Yup, no paid app that would allow me to have unlimited practice. This means that if I get more than five answers wrong, I have to stop my practice and login later in the day to complete my practice, with usually only 2-3 hearts.

Now, this milestone has me thinking: What other daily habits could I instil into my life and consistently do for 450 days?

Healthy, clean eating? This would be amazing.

Drink a minimum of 4 cups of water? My body would love this.

Get into bed by 10:00pm each night? Ohhh, that would delicious.

Are there free apps for all these things?

I do love the game that Duolingo creates in my mind and I love keeping up with my streak. Why did I decide to use the App? Many of my students use Duolingo to help them develop their second language skills. I was super curious to see how the lessons worked and soon after I started in December 2022, I was hooked. My ultimate goal is to get back to Germany and have a conversation in German with my best friend and her children.

Cheers to streaks of healthy habits!

Have a beautiful Thursday and love what you do.

xoxox Joanna