Category Archives: author

Be a Papa Dealing with Death

Death.

Divorce.

Despair.

Distance.

These four D’s that I talked about in my last post can bring us to our knees.

These gifts of grief can also help us rise into who we truly are.

This is what it’s been like for our Papa as he finds a new normal without his beloved wife after 52 years.

The partner Papa loved to share with and bounce ideas off of.

The woman who showered him with food love and a beautiful home.

The exceptional mother of his handsome boys.

The ever present Grandma of his five grandchildren.

Papa could have easily been brought to his knees but he truly has risen.

Going to many of the grandchildren’s events in the last three weeks.

Planning a funeral to honour his beloved wife and my mother-in-law.

Papa has poured out gratitude for everyone’s help.

He has poured out his heart in tears and given himself space to grieve.

May all people deal with grief like our Papa. He is a role model for us all.

Blessings poured over you, Papa, as you walk this journey. We, your fellow grief journeyers, are so proud of you.

Xoxox

Be Uncomfortable (Dealing with D’s)

Nope, not talking about bra size!

We will all deal with grief from death, divorce, despair, and distance!

This grief is uncomfortable. It can metaphorically push your face into or feel like you are walking through mud every single day.

For me, my metaphor for grief is like being in a rowboat on the ocean. You never know what the weather will be or what waves will come upon you in your boat of grief every single moment. The weather can change at any moment and your boat can become swamped. The weather can be beautiful and you can rest in your boat and see the beauty all around you. And other times you can barely see the finger in front of you through the fog of grief.

Grief looks differently for everybody at different ages and stages. It is an incredibly personal and individual journey. We can hold space for and with each other, but no one can row the grief journey for you. I am sorry to say.

It’s uncomfortable.

It’s work.

It’s dealing with sh*t.

It’s looking your heart and soul straight in the eye.

It’s being present.

Moment by moment.

Feeling the feels.

Dealing with the deal of:

Death of a family, friend of fur baby.

Divorce from a short or long term partnership.

Despair from situations around us.

Distance from people or places you love.

Whatever your D may be.

As I write this, I hold space with my fellow grief journeyers. I want to encourage everyone to embrace the grief, feel it deeply and surround yourself with surroundings and support that help you!

This is what my very personal grief work looked like for me today..

Spending time on my own.

Surrounded by nature.

Pedalling my bike.

Finding support with people at my gym.

Nourishing my body with super food nutrition so that I don’t gain forty pounds like I did five years ago when my mom died.

Riding the waves of grief

Being uncomfortable.

Be a Grower or a Grumbler

Last night, I was talking to an old student of mine about her new job working in a retirement home for the local health authority. I used to work full time in education. Both of these union jobs are where wages are not determined by your performance but dependant on how long you have worked there and what level of education or specific job title you have. Again, how much you are paid is not dependent on how well you do your job.

In this type of occupation where the monetary value is not determined by performance, I have personally witnessed that we end up with two types of employees: Growers and Grumblers.

Growers have their focus on always learning first and growing themselves then they have their eyes focused on exactly who they are there to serve. They embrace visionary leadership that may be different to how they do things. If they see problems, they have solutions to go along with them, plus they take action to solve those problems. Growers live in a constant state of being able to adapt, see the change and be the change. They overflow with gratitude and enjoy 99% of their time in their position.

Grumblers have their focus solely on how things “used to be” or how things “ought to be”. They love talking about what’s wrong. That’s it, they just love talking about what’s wrong. Leadership that involves any type of vision, change or growth is not embraced, but rather seen as another thing to add to the “what’s wrong” list. They live in a constant state of stress, worry and fear. Grumblers clearly do not enjoy most things about their jobs and they are sure to let everyone know when it’s almost Friday. I have been both a Grower and a Grumbler so I speak these words from personal experience.

Three things I discovered reflecting on these two types of employees were:

~ Grumblers tend to stick together. Growers seems to stick together. It appears they don’t often have a high tolerance for each other.

~ Inside this type of employee structure, the Grumblers are often the loudest and have the largest amount of influence.

~ Outside of this employee culture, Growers prevail. The Growers are the ones that most people gravitate towards, even the Grumblers. Where performance matters, Growers shine. Grumblers fall behind.

Since leaving the education world full time, I have full embraced and now thrive in the performance-based structure of creating income. As an entrepreneur, I know, with certainty, that my business will only grow to the rate that I grow myself. As an entrepreneur, I am paid by the value that I provide to my customers and the world around me. I don’t have a set income. I can choose who to surround myself with. Truly the opportunities are endless.

I loved education. I was passionate about learning alongside my students. And I still use the skills and knowledge that I received in that profession, but I am very happy to be outside that environment and surrounded by Master Growers every. Single. Day.

Growers.

Planting.

Looking.

Open.

Seeking.

Finding.

Grumblers.

Harvesting.

Talking.

Closed.

Sitting.

Found.

Take a look around you today and see who you are surrounded by. Are they Growers or Grumblers? This will tell you exactly where you are. Believe I know. I have been surrounded by both and lived as both. And like I said, now that I am surrounded by Master Growers. I can never go back into the Grumbler culture.

Find freedom my friends.

Exactly as you are.

Exactly where you are.

Never stop growing.

Surround yourself with Growers.

Be.

Enough.

Joanna 😘

<come hangout with me on Instagram @cannjoanna)

Dedicated to all the growers that surround me, inspire me, share what they are learning about and what they are grateful for.

Be Writing a Blog about Your Blog

Have you ever thought about writing a blog?

If yes, what would your blog be about?

I started writing this blog over ten years ago. I believe that there is value in every person writing a blog about one thing they are passionate about, just one thing they are passionate about. It can be anything. A blog is simply a post with a title, two or more pictures and some words strung together in a personal way.

My blog is about my passion to see people living as human “beings” not just as human “doings” on the hamster wheel of life. I want to see people:

⭐️ live AWAKE

⭐️ feel ADEQUATE

⭐️ know ABUNDANCE

⭐️ be ASSURED they are “enough” exactly as they are right now.

In my time as a blogger, I have written over 750 posts. I have had over 17,000 visitors visit my site.

A few of my recent and memorable posts have been:

⭐️ Be Learning Lessons from a Lab where I shared lessons our family learned from our dog as we reflected on her life.

⭐️ Be Savouring the Seasons was a blog I wrote when I kept hearing people complain about the weather. This is one topic that human “doings” love to discuss.

⭐️ Be a Toastmaster was a blog I wrote about my experience in that organization. The post was inspired by a task I needed to complete on my Visionary Communication pathway. I needed to write eight blog posts in under one month. I completed this is February, 2019.

I am very grateful that over ten years ago I took the time to start writing down my thoughts, my poems, my song lyrics as well as journeys of people around me through this “beenough” place. Blogging is one tool that has helped me survive and thrive through the death of my beautiful mama, becoming an entrepreneur, leaving my teaching job and being a mom of boys and wife to Sexy Neck.

Tonight, this process of sitting and writing about this blog has reminded me why I blog. As much as I love blogging, I want to see my blog become a book. Why? For me personally, being a daughter of a librarian, growing up with weekly public library visits and being surrounded by shelves of books in our home, there is something about books. I love the smell of them. I love holding a book in my hands and feeling the pages between my fingers. And the sound of pages flipping is one of the most peaceful sounds I know.

Now, I wonder who will join me in this blogging world from my group of readers. I am very curious to see what you would choose to write about.

Blog away.

You are enough.

Exactly as you are.

Be enough.

😘 Joanna

<come hangout with me on Instagram @cannjoanna>

Be Writing a Blog about Your Blog

Have you ever thought about writing a blog?

If yes, what would your blog be about?

I started writing this blog over ten years ago. I believe that there is value in every person writing a blog about one thing they are passionate about, just one thing they are passionate about. It can be anything. A blog is simply a post with a title, two or more pictures and some words strung together in a personal way.

My blog is about my passion to see people living as human “beings” not just as human “doings” on the hamster wheel of life. I want to see people:

⭐️ live AWAKE

⭐️ feel ADEQUATE

⭐️ know ABUNDANCE

⭐️ be ASSURED they are “enough” exactly as they are right now.

In my time as a blogger, I have written over 750 posts. I have had over 17,000 visitors visit my site.

A few of my recent and memorable posts have been:

⭐️ Be Learning Lessons from a Lab where I shared lessons our family learned from our dog as we reflected on her life.

⭐️ Be Savouring the Seasons was a blog I wrote when I kept hearing people complain about the weather. This is one topic that human “doings” love to discuss.

⭐️ Be a Toastmaster was a blog I wrote about my experience in that organization. The post was inspired by a task I needed to complete on my Visionary Communication pathway. I needed to write eight blog posts in under one month. I completed this is February, 2019.

I am very grateful that over ten years ago I took the time to start writing down my thoughts, my poems, my song lyrics as well as journeys of people around me through this “beenough” place. Blogging is one tool that has helped me survive and thrive through the death of my beautiful mama, becoming an entrepreneur, leaving my teaching job and being a mom of boys and wife to Sexy Neck.

Tonight, this process of sitting and writing about this blog has reminded me why I blog. As much as I love blogging, I want to see my blog become a book. Why? For me personally, being a daughter of a librarian, growing up with weekly public library visits and being surrounded by shelves of books in our home, there is something about books. I love the smell of them. I love holding a book in my hands and feeling the pages between my fingers. And the sound of pages flipping is one of the most peaceful sounds I know.

Now, I wonder who will join me in this blogging world from my group of readers. I am very curious to see what you would choose to write about.

Blog away.

You are enough.

Exactly as you are.

Be enough.

😘 Joanna

<come hangout with me on Instagram @cannjoanna>

Be Creating a King/Queen Culture (Top 3 Tips)

Lessons are everywhere if we look for them! Especially lessons about the culture we want to create for our kids.

After watching my boys learn and negotiate playing ping pong with each other, I have become clearer on exactly what I want for the culture within my family and business. Imagine a little white ball going back and forth, off the roof and walls, teaching us about culture. Yup, that’s how I roll! Lessons are around every corner and at the end of every ping pong paddle.

Here are my three tips for anyone that wants to create a culture where everyone is treated like the royalty they are.

A king.

A queen.

Uniquely created.

Individually gifted.

God-given talents.

Royalty.

My King/Queen culture is:

1. Calm & Strong.

2. Focused & Fierce

3. Humble & Proud.

When my boys were hitting the ping pong ball back and forth, the boys that were calm and strong were the most successful. Flailing, getting annoyed, crying, having temper tantrums on the floor and flopping around like a a leaf in the wind, didn’t help move forward the skills my boys were trying to learn in ping pong. In my life, when I have allowed my emotions to run rabid and guide me, I am neither calm nor strong. In the culture I am creating, calm and strong must reign. The ability to be present exactly where you are, as exactly who you are. The ability to look at situations and what’s happening around me with a peace in my heart and knowing I can handle anything.

Calm & Strong.

Have you every played ping pong or tennis or any other racquet sport? How do some players just smash the ball into the corner of the court? How do they always seem to hit the exact spot that you can’t reach? They are one hundred percent both focused and fierce. They seem to not hear nor see anything happening around them but the object they need to hit. This is the culture I want to create. And something my oldest son has mastered in ping pong. He can really hit that ball. In this King/Queen culture in my business, the focus is first on the person being helped or served. Nothing else matters, I listen without judgement or preconceived notions. I am fiercely focused on finding out what they need and how I can help. Looking for that exact spot where they might have a nutritional hole that needs to be filled.

Focused & Fierce.

Lastly, in this culture the one that will be the most successful must be both humble and proud. When I was watching my boys play ping pong, I could sense the happiness and sense of pride in a shot well done and I knew that they were humble when they won. No showboating or boasting would have been tolerated by the other brothers. Isn’t it amazing to see people that love what they do, take pride in what they do, but are also willing to learn. I truly believe that having a humble heart that knows there is more to learn is such a beautiful thing.

Humble & Proud.

A culture of people willing to learn. A culture of people open to what’s happening around them.

Living as human beings that are:

Calm & Strong.

Focused & Fierce.

Humble & Proud.

In all areas of life, but especially while playing pingpong.

😘 Joanna

<Pop over to Instagram to say hi! @cannjoanna>

Be Observing International Women’s Day

What is a better what to observe and notice International Women’s Day than with words and photos.

This wordsmithing woman threw together some words and founds some pics to show you the faces of the inspiring woman surrounding me.

May the women around you stand by you.

Lift you up.

Hold you up.

Pray you up.

And never stand you up.

The woman in my life that is ALWAYS very present was my Mama.

She made me a better mom to my boys, a more thoughtful friend, a more forgiving wife and always helped me to get over my temper tantrums.

I am grateful for all the women in my life.

If you are the sum of the people you surround yourself with, I am kick *ss.

These are the women in my life.

The ones that truly care and you know that they are there.

Ones that help you with your babies and your business.

Those who nurture your mind, heart and spirit.

Women that help you grow, that you may not even have in a photo. 😉

Thank you to all you wonderful women!

😘 Joanna

Be an Inner #Influencer

#influencer

Who else has noticed the hashtag and word #influencer pop up all over social media?

It is everywhere, chosen by many people as the hashtag of 2019 to grow businesses and get their message out there. I am not buying the #influencer message and here is why: We need to be an #innerinfluencer and not just unconsciously digest the #influencer around us, with their edited pictures and image of the “perfect life”!

These are my three reoccurring thoughts about why we need to be an #innerinfluencer:

First, do you remember taping up posters of famous people on your physical walls and saving them on your computer desktop? It was dreamy. It was wondrous. It was also very fake! The pictures were staged. The smiles probably were too! And now with the invention of photo filters, everyone can have these pictures too! When you open a magazine or even a friend/acquaintance’s social media page, it is most likely filtered, photoshopped and staged just like the pros. Who knows if they had a fight with their husband two minutes before or are a million dollars in debt? The pictures won’t show or let us know what’s really going on.

It’s really doesn’t matter though, because in the 21st century YOU are the star of YOUR life. Go on a journey to look at your own unique gifts and talents. Look back to your childhood and when you were free and hanging up those posters of Ricky Schroeder or Backstreet Boys. What did you truly love to do and what did you want to be? This will be the greatest influence in your life. Be an #innerinfluencer. We can no longer allow ourselves to be influenced by magazine pictures and social media posts by celebrities or friends, it truly is only an illusion.

Second, do we really know the lives of the people that are calling themselves #influencer and do we want to have them influencing our lives? I was truly shocked to hear about the divorce of the Bezos. (He is the CEO of Amazon and they had build their business together.)

I have seen the power of outside influencers over and over in education where one child and even one word from another child can shift the personality and culture of individual children and an entire classroom. For example, just this year, one of my boys walked away from a beautiful friendship. This friend of my son’s is a heart-centred, kind and so much fun. My son and I have watched this boy become mean and moody because of the influence of another student in the class. My son lovingly created space and allowed his #innerinfluence to guide him. He walked away from this friendship. This is the greatest lesson my son has had with friendship in his short life and it has been a gift.

Take time to know the people who have influence in your life. Ask yourself three hard questions: Are you allowing yourself to be influenced by people who have your values and desires? Are you choosing to be influenced by people who mirror who you are and where you want to go? Can we really know these things about people not in our inner circle? Boom shakalaka. Three hard but very important questions to ask about influence. Here they are again:

1️⃣ Are you allowing yourself to be influenced by people who have your values and desires?

2️⃣ Are you choosing to be influenced by people who mirror who you are and where you want to go?

3️⃣ Can we really know these things about people not in our inner circle?

Lastly, the greatest influencers in my life don’t even participate in social media. Where do your greatest influencers exist? My influencers are my Sexy Neck, my three boys, my mother in heaven, my Heavenly Father, and a circle of friends that share their lives with me. I love the music of many musicians. I love the acting of many actors. I love the athleticism of professional athletes. I am inspired by many social media personalities with their beautiful quotes and pictures. BUT, rarely do I allow this group of people, unless I know them personally, to influence my life. I choose to be an #innerinfluencer, leaning into my gifts and talents, looking at where I need to grow and living as a human “being” with my tribe every day of my life.

I believe we are living in a world where reality is shifting, what we see is not really the way things are. The reality is the prettiest pictures and the slickest words get the greatest amount of attention, if we choose to pay attention. I want to encourage each of us that read these words to be looking outside with eyes open wide and looking within with hearts open wide.

You are a unique human being. There is truly no single human being in the world that is just like you.

May my words be an #influencer for you to look within as an #innerinfluencer because this is where the juicy dreams live in the 21st century.

😘 Joanna