Tag Archives: judgement

Be Writing a Controversial FB Post (Oct. 29th, 2021)

Two years ago, during C@vid, I made this post to encourage every single person in my life. Back then and now, I made a commitment to never share my personal opinion or share anything about my personal health during this time of the greatest science experience during our family’s life. We made the commitment to watch without judgement, to pray without ceasing and to support every single person in our lives.

After I posted these words, I received emails about waxing and masks plus judgement that I was anti-wax and anti-mask. I found this very interesting.

Here is the post from two years ago, and you can take a look for yourself and reflect on where you were at two years ago with your friends who were stressed working in health care, friends who were stressed in general and others that were discriminated against here in British Columbia because they wouldn’t share their health status.

Humbly, here we go with sharing the FB post that included my smiling face and a big old high five hand in the front of the frame:

“High five on this Friday 🖐🏻 to the people who are waxed and unwaxed. To people who are doing their best every day. 😅🤗 To the people grieving deep loss from C, to the people afraid to see their doctors because of C, to the friend who’s family won’t speak to her because she isn’t waxed (even though she is now waxed but isn’t telling them!), to people supporting children with new neurological issues and cousins with enlarged hearts due to waxing. To people’s whose passion is coaching, but no longer can because their doctor is not recommending they get waxed. I SEE YOU!!! 🤩😍 I am NOT a fan of coercion or incentives for people to get waxed. I am NOT a fan of people having to police 👮🏻 other people (unless you are a police officer, of course)🙏🏻It’s obvious to me looking at numerical data and the hearts of my AMAZING friends, we need to do something different than the 100% focus on waxing. 😳😳😳😳 I am a FAN of seeing people healthy and free!

🥰 Thank you to ALL our coaches TODAY, and ALWAYS, who pour into our children and inspire them daily. Sending you LOVE today. 💞💞

… and that’s all folks, that was the post that I am sure has some of the people in my life judging me in a certain light. It simply is a reminder for me that “we don’t see things how THEY are, we see things how WE are.”

Keeping being you and love what you do.

xoxo Joanna

Be Having No Time

I don’t have time to talk about you because if you are an important person in my life I am talking TO you.

I don’t have time to worry about if you have lost or gained weight, I am 100% focused on my own health.

I don’t have time to ponder what you are doing with your life, but I am praying that you would have a life filled with love, joy and peace.

I don’t have time to wonder why you left my life and want nothing to do with me as I am completely enveloped with love by the people who choose to spend time with me.

I don’t have any time to think about who you love or want to marry, I am focused on making my own relationships better.

I don’t have time to wonder why my family of origin has fallen far apart since my mom died. The rich relationships that have filled this Grand Canyon gap from my mom’s death and the ‘chosen family’ who shower us with encouragement are greater than any gift I could imagine.

I don’t have time to judge what you do with your money, your time or your relationships because God is showing me all the good He is doing through knowing you.

I don’t have time. I don’t believe in busy. I don’t believe in missing anyone.

I create time.

Busy is a swear word.

If I miss you, I reach out to you. The only people I miss are dead. They definitely don’t have any time.

Make time for what’s important to you folks.

Have an epic Monday and love what you do.

xoxo Joanna

Be Thriving with the six to eight day per year peeps

Summer 2019 is here!

And its SURVIVAL mode for those people being inundated with company, people they see six to eight days per year. I had an epiphany to share with you, one to make you THRIVE this year.

First, start by thinking about those 365 day per year peeps in your life. Who are the people you live with or choose to have in your inner circle? What do you have in common with them and why do you choose to hangout with them? What do you talk about and what do you love to do together?

Now, think about those six to eight days per year people. Next proceed to throw everything that you thought about and love about your 365 day per year people and fling it directly into the bottom of the swimming pool. These peeps that are in your life six to eight days per year, may be old friends or family. They may be colleagues from your spouses work that you attend conferences with or neighbours you only see in the summer.

Here’s my secrets to not only SURVIVE but THRIVE with these peeps.

Remember that everything that you thought and love about your 365 day per year peeps has been flung to the bottom of the swimming pool, now throw any negative thought or judgement about the six to eight days per week peeps in there too!

Get ready to look at you: What are your standards for healthy relationships and how do you want to interact with all people, no matter how often they are in your life? For me, this is pouring love and bringing the joy. I don’t share much about my life or even feelings at all, with my six to eighters, I save this for my 365 days per year peeps. But I do have fun with everyone. We eat nourishing delicious food. We go on and find adventures. We talk about travel. We discuss health. But I do not go into the deep end! Remember all that stuff that you had flung down into the deep end of the pool? Don’t go there! Oh I used you and boy what a mess it made.

These six to eighters can’t keep up with the change that happens in the other over three hundred and fifty days of your life. They can’t embrace the change because it would be like getting hit by a fast moving train. The people who can keep up, are on the train. Invested in you. In your inner circle. Those every day peeps who support and love you. The six to eighters receive the benefit of your high standards and love-filled hospitality. But that’s it folks. You may end up talking about things you don’t give a shit about for hours, but you ask questions and listen. You probably will end up doing mind numbing activities that were never on your wish list, but you will discover the joy and enjoy the ride. You will create space to recharge with who you are as you live these six to eight days per year. I exercise. I read. I spend a lot of time locked in the bathroom. I bring games I enjoy playing. I bring up new topics of conversations and then change it back once I see the six to eighters eyes start to gloss over.

Imagine….

Pure joy.

Overflowing love.

Judgement thrown away.

Negative thoughts too!

Thriving with the peeps who show up six to eight days per year.

Staying on your train, but diverting long enough to embrace other peoples rides.

THRIVING!

Be In Relationship or Right? 

As I lay my head down on the pillow, I ponder relationships, as I often do.  My peeps.  My random people.  All humans who crossed my path today.   

I shower gratitude over the people in my everyday life: our neighbours, our friends, our teachers, our coaches, our secretaries, our service industry works.  

I feel sadness and wonder what I could do with those ‘lost’ relationships.  I wonder about what I could have done differently and I often come to the conclusion of: NOTHING. 

As I lay my head down on the pillow, I realize that some people would rather be right than be in relationship.  It is truly their way or the highway.  They actually like to be “highway patrollers” telling others how to drive on the highway of life.  For me, my patrollers, are no longer in relationship with me because I didn’t do what they wanted me to do.   I don’t want to drive my vehicle in their style.  They are right and I am wrong.   And I am totally okay with that! 

I may be wrong but I walk in freedom.  Complete and utter freedom.  As a recovering perfectionist, I am no longer afraid of wrong.  I am no longer afraid to fail.  I am failing faster than ever before as I learn about fueling my body and moving out of my comfort zones. (Because we all know that this is where the magic happens!)   I believe our greatest learning happens when we pick ourselves up after we fall down. I am no longer afraid of others judgements or insight in my wrongs.  I am too busy growing myself. I honestly don’t have time or energy to judge what others are doing. Plus, I value relationships over being right. 

I love my peeps, where we can talk honestly and opening about where we are at.  Our lives aren’t all glossy like a magazine cover, it is like a gorgeous diamond bracelet with the shine and shadows.   No one is striving to be right nor wrong but to be in relationship.  

Loving. 

Laughing.  

Learning.  

Living.  

In relationship! 💛

(This post is written in celebration of a group of women who met this morning to share the life and death of their beautiful mamas! #griefgirls) 

Be Proud

My son is almost fifteen months old. He cannot walk, but he sure can climb! He climbs his brothers’ bunk bed ladder, onto kitchen chairs. Today, he climbed up on the couch in between his big brothers. He was so proud!

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This proud moment made me think of judgement for some reason and my judgement in particular.

It would be easy to judge the fact that my son isn’t walking as the ‘norm’ is 12 months.

It is easy for me to judge, myself especially. But I need to learn to be proud of the little things and let the other things go! My inner dialogue could probably burn a house down. I am very hard on myself.

My children have become my teachers in many ways. Thank you baby boy for my lesson today,

Joanna be proud!