Tag Archives: Christmas

Be “UnBusy”

Right now, I can sense a whirling of energy around me.

Fluttering here and there.

Cars driving quickly.

People walking swiftly.

All around the city.

This way and that.

Me, I choose to be “UnBusy”.

Busy is the swear word of the season.

Right up there with the f-word.

Beside the bar of soap that my mouth got washed out with.

Busy?

Keeping ourselves occupied?

Have a great deal to do?

These are a choice.

Being busy is a choice.

What’s on the ‘to-do’ list is a choice.

Yes, it is 100% up to us.

Fluttering here and there.

Driving quickly.

Walking swiftly.

All around the city.

This way and that.

Or not at all.

I used to rock the ‘to-do’ list.

This list would make me feel productive.

Make me feel occupied.

Now I have created space to be.

Sitting here.

Moving there.

Talking here.

Wondering there.

I purposely move slowly and with ease.

Walking quietly in the crackle of snow.

All around my beautiful city.

Wherever my boys or mind take me.

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Incredible beauty surrounding us in this season.

Ready to envelop and shower us with peace.

Right now, I sense a purple energy all around me.

Loving.

Being.

Seeing.

Allowing.

Peace in this season.

 

Be Celebrating a “Cann”tastic Christmas 2015 

Celebrating friendship, Jesus’s birth, family, and just being together!  We had an amaaaaazing Christmas.  Love a duck, I do have to say it was “Cann”tastic! 

    
 There were so many coincidences and blessings that came our way.  The opportunities we have to talk and sit with people were inspiring.

Skiing.

Skating.

Bowling.

Road Trip.

Lego.

Sleds.

Food.

And discovering a ski sign with our last name on it.

A “Cann”tastic Christmas! 

Be Finding Solace on Skis 

Being present to what we are feeling and thinking takes awareness, especially during the holiday seasons.  

It is easy to let time zip by in busyness, unaware of our body, mind and spirit.  It is easy to get wrapped up in wrapping just doing without being.  

Holidays are often wrapped up in a beautiful package of past memories and experiences that create our present life.    In my book, I talk about my ‘be enough’ mindset and allowing myself space to care for my soul.    

This year, I continue to unwrap past Christmas seasons, grieving the loss of my mom while being aware of my desire to create magical memories for my brood of boys.

I chose to be enough by strapping on my sticks! Heading off in the early morning on cross country skiis, solo. Allowing the thoughts float on by, in silence, in beauty with birds chirping me on as I pass by.  

I chose to be enough by strapping on my boards.  Heading off during the day on downhill skiis with my boys.  Allowing laughter to pour out, looking for jumps, in beauty with my boys hooting and hollering as I go by. 

Creating space to be.  

Exactly where I am.  

In body, mind and spirit.  

Finding solace on my skiis.  

Being me.  

 

Be Knowing What DRIVES You!

Have you ever wanted something so bad that all you could do was talk about it, think about it, dream about it?

Perhaps you wanted a pony as a child.

Maybe it was to make it to the Olympics.

I wonder if it was thinking about getting married.

What was that “something” that just drove you into perpetual conscious and unconscious thought which caused you massive action?

This morning it started with a question from a personal development course that I am doing: What drives people?

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Luckily I have an inner circle that is very tolerant of my philosophical questions coming out of thin air, so I started by texting one person.

Princess P ended up saying: “People that I love and enjoy, nature, adventures… Celebrations and traditions power me.”

Next I texted another person, Dr. K to hear what she had to say: “Before coffee: coffee”. (I must admit that I get up so early and excited for each day that I forget people may still be sleeping.)  After coffee, she text back and said, “Health and Happiness”. And then Dr. K asked her mom and she said, “Live in the moment and look to the future… not stuck in the past with regrets.  Also strive for excellence not perfection.”

Then I texted a few people more because I was oh so curious.  I love PEOPLE and I loved hearing what drives them.

One friend shared that she was contemplating this exact question.

Awesome A shared, “Creating a loving home for my family.”

Double D (the one who keeps giving me back my hat!), said, “My family” and

RvZ said “Work, play, laughter, kinda combo. Achievement. Getting stuff done. But the days that I spend in nature are pretty top.”

When you have great conversations like that all day long and ponder such a question like “What drives you?” the answers come clearly.

What drives me?

Harmony.

Freedom.

I seek harmony in the world around me through relationships, nature, and within myself.

I move towards freedom to be my authentic self, freedom poured out for others to be exactly who they are, time and financial freedom for my family and friends.

What drives you?

Here is my “drive” story for today: Before dinner, my boys, spied a digger down end of our road.   They had this incredible drive to go and see this digger.  The talked about this digger and wondered why it was there throughout the entire dinner. They ate without complaint and then they were off out the door without a word, just so that they could get an eye on this digger.

Drive.

Target.

Success.

The boys reached their target!

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Our brain is a cybernetic system and unless you pick a target, your unconscious brain will choose something for you.   Think about these three boys and yourself as a child, what drove you?  What did you love to talk about, think about, dream about?

Today, why don’t you find what drives you and then choose the target?

Go for it!

You “Cann” do it.

Be Hitting the Targets I Set!

One of the best hockey players in the world, Wayne Gretzky, was once quoted as saying: “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take!”

Before I wasn’t even in the game.

I was working very hard.

Going no where.

I was floating.

Listening to all the chatter around me.

Now, I am listening to the still inner voice inside of ME.

In my life right now I am taking a TON of shots.

Saying “yes” to new opportunities.

Being open to the possibilities.

Allowing myself to feel deeply and go deeper still.

This week, I was on the phone with M, someone that I have known for almost ten years… She is twenty-something and she is a FORCE.

I was sharing with M my last sixteen week journey of setting goals and achieving them.

Here is a photo of this first journey:

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Now after a very fun sixteen weeks of achieving many goals, I was in a quandary. Weight loss is no longer one of my MAJOR goals.  Hmmmmm… Now what?  I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with this second challenge and I expressed my ‘unknowing’ to friend/business partner.

Later in the day, she send me her ideas via text.   My ‘unknowing’ brought out a ‘knowledge’ in her that profoundly helped me and spurred me on.  Isn’t it awesome that she even thought of having “party tricks” as a goal!!

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Here is what I came up with because of her awesome inspiration:

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And here is me getting started to see where I am at: (It wasn’t pretty!)

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4 push-ups (the last one was with VERY shaky arms)

No chin-ups (I could barely hang there for 2 seconds)

And NOW I am off moving towards the targets that I set for myself.

The ULTIMATE goal is to be the healthiest ME and live the most energetic, positive-infused days of my life with my brood of boys, family and incredible circle of friends.

Be on a Threshold

How do you explain something with words that is just a feeling?

What do you say to describe a place where only you may be at?

I have been searching for weeks to describe this sense of where I am as I begin 2015.

Suddenly, as I read another woman’s story, it hit me:

“Threshold.”

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A word to describe where I am at.

The best one that I can conjure up.

I am neither living in my past, nor do I feel that I am moving anywhere in the forward direction.

Sitting.

Holding still.

On a threshold.

For those that know me well, they know that holding still is not my forte.

Give me a list.

Tell me what needs to be “done”.

Ask me to organize.

I am your woman!

But not now.

Maybe not again.

My head is still fuzzy.

The grief I feel is deep and raw.

The hole my mom has left in my life is vast.

So I sit, peacefully in my home.

Happy on the ski hill.

Surrounded by love.

Glancing back.

Looking forward.

Just being.

On the threshold.

Be Filled with JOY

I think many people are quite curious about me in this season of grief and remembering wrapped up with Christmas.

Curious as to my state of mind.

Wondering how I am doing.

I think I may ‘appear’ to be too happy for some people in my life.

But I am here to tell you I am not happy about many things…and my life has nothing to do with happiness right now.

For me, joy comes with or without happiness.

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It hits me no matter my daily circumstance or season.

Joy is not from me, but a gift from God.

Gratitude, love, joy!

Flooding me, pouring out, flowing in.

It is nothing I am ‘doing’.

I am just ‘being’.

Being present with the people God has surrounded me with.

Allowing my sadness to hit me.

It is one year, less one day, since my mom’s death.

One more ‘first’ to live without mom.

In my sadness, I know JOY will be coming.

The joy of the Lord is my strength. (Nehemiah 8:10)

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Leaning into Him through my struggles.

Thanking Him for ALL I am grateful for.

Watching JOY fill this season.

Merry ‘joy-filled’ Christmas to you and yours.

Be the Power of a Penny

This blog post was started in the summertime as I was playing a “healthy living” game with my friend Penny and an old neighbour and her friend T.  I had to add to the post after our ski vacation a few days ago… and finally introduce you to one wonderful human being and friend.  Formally know on my blog as Princess P and now just Penny.

Here is a photo of the people playing our summertime game: My teammate Penny and I on the right and our wonderful opponents on the left. 20140704-135917-50357437.jpg

Here are my boys sharing some after dinner books at Auntie Penny’s house. My boys cherish the wonderful books she had for her own children.  We love going over to their house for dinner!

20140704-135916-50356828.jpgPenny made a special point to celebrate our middle guy’s fifth birthday before she went on an European summer holiday. He was thrilled with the very special transformer and book she bought him.

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And now while they were working hard to renovate their bathrooms and get ready for their own three wonderful children’s arrival, Penny and Bob came to spend a few wonderful hours with our family on the ski hill.

Penny knew my mom always made PJ’s for my boys at Christmastime and look what she got the boys:

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One of the other gifts that my mom has always given me over the years is a knitted scarf and look what I pulled out of the Christmas bag from Penny:

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A very lovely, hand-loving-made scarf!

The depth of gratitude I feel is incredible.

When you lose someone important in your life, there is a HUGE hole.

Forever.

The greater the love, the deeper the hole.

But others will lean in and close the gap.

The hole won’t pull you in and down.

People are holding me up right now in prayer and physical presence and “knowing”.

Penny has brought us such joy through these beautiful, thoughtful, handmade gifts.

These were very important to our family.

Healing through fabric.

My mom is gone, but never forgotten.

She lives on through all of us who “knew” her.

Generous.

Thoughtful.

Caring.

Kind.

Mom.

And now the power of a Penny!

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Be Snowball, Bumps & Jumps and Magic Carpet Rider

Merry Christmas from our boys:

Three Year Old Magic Carpet Rider

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Seven Year Old Bumps & Jumps

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Five Year Old Snowball

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Laughter in the midst of tears.

Winter amidst the desert.

Rowing my boat of grief.

Riding my skis down the slopes.

Taking it ALL in.

Living it now!

Deal with it now rather than later.

I ain’t no sweeping it under the carpet kind of girl.

But I do love riding the magic carpet too!

God is gracious to give me these three amazing boys.

I love you Magic Carpet Rider, Bumps & Jumps and Snowball.

Be Going on a Ski Vacation

We had the great privilege to spend three days and two nights up at a ski resort.  Ski in/ski out, eat in/eat out, ride up/swoosh down, sunshine/snow.  It truly was a vacation for all of us, including Papa.

A break from routine.

A diversion from the upcoming one year anniversary of mom leaving us for heaven.

A snow-filled, sun-filled, winter-activity weekend.

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Our great friends, Baron Bob and Princess P came and visited us for the evening.  The boys went tubing with them for the first time and even go to try the mini-snowmobiles (one day later, once the worker could get them started!)

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Nordic skiing down the Bridal Path where we saw snowmobiles, horse-drawn carriages and a few other skiers. IMG_7661[1]

Playing some hockey on the pond with Papa.  Everyone got into the action this year!

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Tubing… three year old OC looked a little small for the tube, but he was allowed.

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The boys were very, very excited to go on the mini-snowmobiles.  JC ran into a snow fence, CC managed to zip around him and come back around the loop.

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It was a wonderful pre-Christmas vacation!

May the Lord hold you close this Christmas where ever you are physically and within yourself.

What a wonderful season it is to celebrate Jesus’s birthday.  

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