Category Archives: Self-help

Be Loving Autumn Leaves

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I love autumn!

Today, this quote below inspired me and spurred me on as we endure this season of change in our lives.

We humans have a lot to learn from autumn trees. No one of us wants to be so surrendered, so vulnerable to winter as the October trees. Yet each of us, if we are truly open to growth and change, will experience this in our inner lives…New growth means change.”
• Joyce Rupp, Fresh Bread

Our neighbours tree:

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JC’s Autumn Blaze Maple
*CC’s hasn’t changed colour yet and we haven’t planted OC’s yet.

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A tree in front of JC’s pod at school.

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A tree on the playground in front of CC’s preschool.

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Be In Some Sort of Book/Foot Club

Four years ago I decided I wanted to develop deeper relationships with a few women surrounding me. I decided that I was going to start a modern-day quilting bee which is formally known as a book club.

I have just arrived home from book club and I have to introduce you to these four real women. I think there should be a television series about them.

The first cast of character in this lovely book club that I look forward to every month is:

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• Princess P. She’s the sage one of the group. Her laughter could set off a tsunami because it is so wide and deep and contagious. Princess P is one of those people that is a deep friend. I worked beside P.P. in my first couple of years of teaching. Since then she is always been a good friend to me, Sexy Neck and all three of my boys. In fact one of the treasured thing that my boys have are the quilts that she has made each of them. She’s married to a smart businessman and public servant. She has raised beautiful, grounded and independent twins and a third child who loves life, her family, friends and firefighters.

The second cast in our crew of book lovers is:

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• Dreadlock D. D is an early 30’s. She loves everyone, well except her neighbour by the same name. She is an inspiring person who loves to cook, care for her two sweet children, her Electrician husband and the extended family. She does not want to be a lunchtime supervisor even though that might be in her future one day, but she will definitely be an inspiration to many people no matter what she does. She’s one of those people that is always there for you no matter what. She can light up a room with her humour and a few F-bombs thrown in for good measure.

The third character we will call PTP

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• I have known PTP since I first moved to Vtown thirteen years ago. She has been a steadfast friend,pre-kids,during kids, during labor,pregnancy and all sorts of stages and crazies. She is an athlete with fortitude and strength that you wouldn’t believe. She is a paddling physiotherapist. She is a previous Ballerina turned rower extraordinaire now runner, cross-country skier and I could go on. She is a fierce athlete and an amazing friend. PTP takes care of her amazing kids, her Educator husband, and the dog. She’s a pretty incredible, thoughtful and caring person.

The last character in our beautiful bookclub is:

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• Dr. K. She not only takes care of our eyes, she takes care of her family too. Her husband loves planes, trains and automobiles. (Okay maybe the trains should be replaced with helicopters.) She encourages all his passions, takes care of their wonderful Kindergarten son as well as the dog. Kim is also an incredible friend. She has provided more food, encouraging words and time during this cancer, torn Achilles, sickness, pregnancy, childbirth stage in my life. She is also pretty incredible neighbor and I wish that we had never moved off the street. In the midst of great Hawaiian themed parties, hockey and exercising she manages to keep everything in balance, especially her relationships.

This cast of four beautiful women started off as a book club but have become to me like four humongous feet! Yup, I said FEET.

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They are all different shapes and sizes. They have helped me stay standing and even walk through this time. Sometimes I have needed them to be my own feet and sometimes they have walked beside me nudging me along. Sometimes we all get a little smelly, especially me, but no matter what feet are very very important and I cannot tell you how important these women have become to me as I go through this time of moving cities, new beginnings and new relationships and really a new life through this disease called cancer.

These women are also like feet because
they have five toes sometimes all going in different directions with their family, their work, their friends, hobbies (do we have hobbies?), and their dreams and they managed to somehow always stay ‘attached’ and grounded no matter what’s going on. They are able to be real about their marriages and their children and what it is really like to be a mother and a woman in the 21st-century.

I’m so grateful for these beautiful feet/Book Clubbers and I’m so grateful that we can spend this time together and I can’t wait to see what the year entails for all of us.

Now make sure you have a glass of wine, some good appetizers and a good book, but most importantly be in a “Club”!

PS. We skyped with a real live author tonight at book club. Did you know that authors did that? We didn’t. This author was a force. Post coming soon.

Be Remembering

I remember running in fear to and from the stop sign,

searching, looking for the boogie man.

I remember monsters lurking under my bed and around every

corner and in every closet.

I remember fire, falling and blindness in my dreams,

sometimes I still remember those.

I remember being trapped in a bin, outside the house,

in closets, in darkness.

I remember being shut out, turned from, not listened to,

I ran away alone.

I remember sleepovers I didn’t want to be at,

many I came home from.

I remember feelings of discomfort, judgement, inability to live up to expectations,

oh ya, I still have those.

I remember fearing alcohol, the effect on my body and others.

I remember preaching abstinence from it.

NOW I know in my body the light,

I remember God’s light shining in my basement bedroom in 1995,

I remember God’s love, His acceptance, His peace, His kindness, His grace.

I remember His ways are not my ways.  Everything doesn’t have to make sense.

I remember God is who He says He is in the bible, in nature, in wise people around me.

I remember the fragrance of heaven surrounding me.

I remember to trust, let go of performance and to REST.

I remember the FoRest, by the pond where God meets me.

I remember His word is alive and active in ME… yup me.

I remember to swing and to allow God to push me.  Swing Joanna!

I remember that I will be healed in 2013.  Glory, Hallelujah.  Thank you Jesus.

My Favourite Song to end off this post:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8welVgKX8Qo

Be Surviving While Your Hubby’s Away – Part II

I had to share another email from my great friend and wise woman, D!  She has been surviving and thriving as her husband has started his new job in a new town.

If you didn’t catch her first hilarious email, here is the link:  https://beenough.wordpress.com/2013/03/08/be-surviving-w…our-hubbs-away/

Before you read her email, I have to say how does she have time to write such witting things and be so self-reflective while being so busy!  We are still house hunting, my husband is on holidays (thus home to help ALL day!) and I am barely keeping all four walls standing.

Here is D’s email:

well… 12 days and nights in now… here’s my tips for how to survive 3 children under 6 without a husband!!
 
1) practice regular desensitization to neck stiffness, headaches, and even skin pain caused from overtiredness (make sure car has carrots – the crunch can keep you awake while driving)
2) feed children toaster waffles and apple juice, not necessarily together (but each a great novelty when never or rarely before been seen!)
3) forget any intention to sweep/mop entire house and just aim for the occasional kitchen sweep
4) drop children at great friend’s place for dinner and go to yoga… the yoga high can carry you for days after!
5) don’t grocery shop. children really can survive on raisins, apples, cheese and the generous donations of friends
6) take your bike in for a tune up. just BEING in the bike shop and feeling your freshly tune ride is a high (even if you might not get a chance to ride until next month…)
7) SING. SING a lot. SING loundly. Same reverberations as screaming, but a lot more pleasant for the children.
8) it’s okay for your 15 month old to say “all done” 15 times in his highchair before you respond. this is particularly true if he woke up before 5, unless he is going to run off and play happily (this tactic can save your neck back and or legs from his 29 lb bug a lug clutches)
9) CHOCOLATE. enuf said.
10) when all goes sideways (meaning kids’ emotions and interactions going downhill), just say loudly “I THINK TODAY IS GOING TO BE AN AMAZING DAY!!” as genuinely as possible. Their shock and surprise will make them forget their lil troubles and move things forward!
 
and my last tip…
 
11) call your husband at 6 am. claim the baby wanted to talk to him. then take the opportunity (while baby enjoys pressing all the beeping buttons) to catch 40 more winks!!

Thanks for sharing again D!  You are inspiring… and how you make me laugh.

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D and I playing a game at her husband’s surprise party. 

Be Into James

I had to share with you a new DVD bible study that I am doing on Jesus’ half brother, James. WOWEEE…

A few thoughts from my two week study so far:

Quote from Martin Luther that he wanted to throw “Jimmy” in the stove.

“There are no easy answers to difficult things. It’s not neat and tidy. We cannot simplify the infinite. We can’t catch the Holy Spirit with a potato sack.”

James may have been the first book of the New Testament.

Chairein, Beth Moore. (Which is the Greek work for James’ salutation in James 1:1. Chairein means “JOY to YOU!”.

Chairein Everyone.

P.S. If you have never heard Beth Moore speak before, strap yourself in!

Be Less “Sugary”

Are you ready for a graphic story and a happy ending?

Six years ago, I started noticing that I was having healthy issues that were affecting my life. I was bloated, I had cramping, I often had to lie down. I even had blood on my stools. I went to my MD and did some blood tests and even a colonoscopy. YUM! The doctor couldn’t find a thing. He told me to just try and “deal with it”.

I am the type of girl that can grin and bear it. I have even pushed through athletic injuries knowing that “no pain no gain” is sometimes appropriate, but this pain, bloating, cramping was not normal.

So for the first time I went to see a Naturopathic doctor. She immediately recognized these symptoms and had me eliminate wheat, dairy, sugar and a few other things. Within 6 week, I was pain and blood free. Within 6 months, I had lost 20 pounds and had never felt better!

Now as I start 2013, I am reflecting on my health and where I want to be as I turn 40 in a few years. I realized that I need to again cut down on the sugar intake! I often wonder if years from now research is going to show us the havoc that sugar creates in human bodies. I know that my cousin in Spain would agree with that.

ImageThis morning I looked at the snow and it made me think of my sugar goal. I realized that the ‘sugar’ I shovel should not be going into my mouth!

Be Nostalgic Not Stupid

Merry Christmas Everyone! To my new and old friends, and to my family (given and chosen).

Here is my Christmas life lesson for you!

I tend to get emotionally attached to things. In my daily life, I have to make a conscious effort to let “things” go. This include mostly physical things that have been given to me and words that have been said to me.

I was reminded of the importance of letting go on Christmas Eve.

Here is a photo of our awesome Christmas tree picked out together as a family from a local Christmas tree farm. Our eldest son just put the angel on top of the tree.

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Here is the tree after my husband unplugged it on Christmas Eve. The plug sparked and the lights went dark.

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Now here is the background information that I need to share: I have vehemently refused to buy new lights for our tree because these are the exact same lights that were on my tree as a child. My parents have a beautiful artificial tree with lights and I wanted their old lights! We have been using these lights for about ten years and my parents had them for over twenty years… So you can imagine…

Now I need to have a little talk with myself: Seriously, Joanna, don’t be stupid. Give up the lights!

Now comes the hard work because I am trying to figure out what else I am holding onto that could potentially burn down my house!

Be a Panda in a Heat Gym

Whenever I coach volleyball, my eldest son loves to come with me. He insists on wearing his “coaching” shirt which is a University of Alberta Pandas volleyball shirt. This shirt is precious to him (and me!) as it was given to him by my coach when I played. Her daughter had worn the shirt until she grew out of it.

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I love this shirt too! But last week, I was coaching at the University of British Columbia Okanagan Club Volleyball tryouts (Whew, that was a mouthful!). I chose my wardrobe carefully, wearing a Heat shirt of course! He wore his Panda shirt and I must admit that I received a comment from someone on the Heat coaching staff.

It made me realize how immune my son is to doing something simple that made someone else feel uncomfortable.

How often do I do the “comfortable” thing because I don’t want to offend anyone? How often do I do something because I don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings?

EVERY SINGLE DAY!

I am so outwardly focused on wondering and worrying about my actions or words and how they are perceived by people outside my immediate circle. My inner circle gets the “real” Joanna, but others get a watered-down “comfortable” version of Joanna.

This simple shirt incident made me realize that I need to be more like my five year old son. Every day, I need to put on my ‘coaching shirt’ of my choice, do my best and have fun! Sorry if it makes you feel uncomfortable!