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Be Leaving Slippers at the Door

My mom died just over two years ago.

Wump!

My dad has not been a part of our daily life in the last nine months.

Wump! Wump!

My life and the daily rhythm of my brood of boys has changed drastically over the last two years.  The two people that played such a significant part in their lives, are now gone.

Gone without understanding or knowing.

Disappeared from our presence but not from our thoughts or our hearts.

We cannot pretend to understand another’s grief.

We can only sit with them in acceptance for wherever they are.

We cannot judge.

We can only be.

Last Thursday, after much personal work with a beautiful counsellor, we decided to leave Papa’s slippers outside the door.

A symbol of welcoming.

In hopes that he will soon return.

To our daily life.

With his arms always loaded with fun things to do and great gifts to eat.

With his joyful laughter and silly stories.

Our door is always open to you Papa!

We don’t understand.

But we love!

With open hearts.

Open arms.

Open doors.

Your slippers are waiting Papa!

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Be Driving Home After Surgery

I have been singing this song all morning. Country Roads. This is the version by Olivia Newton-John, not John Denver.

Mom and dad are driving home in the sunshine today. They should be back at home before dinner. I am extremely grateful.

M was a star down in VCity holding the fort at the hotel, taking meals to the hotel, going swimming with dad and being a great support for mom and dad. Her hubby,C, again held down the fort at home to free M up and even endured the two hour pre-op appointment last Tuesday. What a team!

Nana and papa just dropped in on they way. Yeah!!

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Be A Nurse

Boys, it’s time to sit down on our virtual couch and have a little chat. I know that you are only six, four and almost two, but we need to talk about your future careers.

We think you should all start out and do the two year LPN program so that you can learn everything we have been trying to learn in the last two weeks.

Two weeks ago your Nana went into the hospital. We knew she had cancer, but we were waiting to hear from the Cancer Clinic since July 20th. Nana is really tough, but she kept getting sicker and sicker.

On Monday, August 5th, Nana went to the ER and was admitted to the hospital because she was dehydrated and it a lot of pain. We found out later that Nana’s tumour was growing.

Lucky for us Dr. Daniels was the Gynaecologist-on-call and she took on mom’s case.

Nana has had Dr. Daniels looking out for her, but it has been the nurses who have worked day and night to help Nana be comfortable.

We have learned the names and kept track of pain killers, anti-nausea drugs, blood thinners, stool softens, cholesterol medication and more powders that I can name. Thank God for pen and paper and the nurse friends we have had on speed dial as well as nurse friends we have run into in the hospital. Here’s amazing Auntie Michelle showing us how to take notes.

We have had many nurses who have touched our hearts, Leslie the first night mom came into the ER, Jackie on 2East as well as all the nurses on the women and children’s ward.

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Nurse Jackie with mom and I

We have probably had over twenty nurses. They know an incredible amount of information about the human body as well as negotiating hospital culture. They have been Nana’s sole provider of giving comfort to us all through medicine, expert knowledge and comforting words.

Today, Nana had a very sleepy day. She didn’t get out for a walk, but she enjoyed some rests and it looks like her bowel obstruction had been healed. Yeah for poo! We put on leg stockings to help the fluid in her legs and she enjoyed some lemon Popsicles made by Rea.

While Nana was in one of her deep sleeps, a nurse crept in to give mom some anti-nausea medication. After she had mom hooked up, she took the time to read this poster you boys made with your cousins.

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The nurse stood with a big smile on her face then whispered “sweet” to me as she walked out the door.

Me, I broke into tears because she took the time to get to “know” about Nana, even when she was only the nurse delivering the medicine.

So boys, the moral of this story is that we aren’t going to insist that you become a nurse, but that you take the time to get to know people God has placed around you at work and at home. If you ever end up in a hospital rely on the nurses because they really are making things happen around here.

Let’s keep praying for Nana’s healing, but we can stop praying for poo.

Be Removing A Closet

What do we really WANT and NEED?

This question keeps rolling through my mind as I wade through the copious amount of stuff in my parents basement and the torn apart house we hope to occupy in less than four weeks.

You will be happy to know that we are not going on the Hoarders TV show, but we are making steps to remove a closet so that all three of our boys can share a room.

Yes, in the world of resale, probably not the best move.  But in the realm of us having the priority that our boys will be close, share their lives and their worlds with each other, getting rid of a closet is something we need to do.

One decision down… 1,368 to go!

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The view of the closet from the hall.  Look at all that space we will have for the boys literal bed room.  We plan on keeping their clothes, books and some toys in the other bedroom down the hall.  The boys are excited about their “sleeping” room and their “book” room as they are calling them.