Tag Archives: cancer
Be Hoping for a Christmas Miracle
Mom is resting tonight on Women’s and Children’s. Today, we had a devastating and sweet day as a family.
It is always sweet to look into mom’s eyes, rub her sore hips and hear her voice. Mom never complains through it all. Just asks nicely for her pain medication and often waits patiently. She is very eagerly looking forward to a nice drink of water….
Now into the devastating part.
Mom had blood work and CAT scan. It showed a mass in abdomen, enlarged lymph nodes (since last Scan three weeks ago), bowel obstruction, kidney/uterers partial blockage and some veins blocked. Red blood cell is at 90 and white count is elevated.
The chemo #4 didn’t shrink the cancer. In fact, a tumour has grown over seven centimetres in the last weeks. The oncologist said, “The cancer has changed in how it is acting. It is growing faster.” (the definition of faster I am not sure about.) She has a tube in her nose to drain out her fluid until she gets surgery for her bowel obstruction. She is thirsty. I pray God would be her living water.
Yup, to top it off this bugger of a tumour is causing a bowel obstruction. Tomorrow or Wednesday, mom will have surgery to relieve this blockage.
We are praying for a miracle. That the surgeon will skillfully fix mom’s blockage, she will have a restful post-operation room and that the oncologists will find the right chemotherapy to kick this bugger of a cancer into remission.
The sweetest moment I saved for last, the boys came to say goodnight to Nana. “Wuv you Nana!”
It was a hard decision to leave Nana but I am hanging out with Papa tonight. I leave mom in God’s hands.
I gave my kiss on the forehead to mom and left her in the hands of the very capable nurses on fourth floor.
I love you mama! Love. Love. Love.
Be ‘Conquering’ Your Pain
Today, I am pondering pain. We all got it somewhere, sometimes.
Today, I got me some pain watching my Mama in pain.
Sitting beside mom in her ER hospital bed, looking at her scrunched up chin, hands that can’t relax and toes that need to dance now that is some pain.
Mom has been a warrior when it comes to pain management. She tries to take the minimal amount of medication with thoughtful purpose. She doesn’t want to take too much for too long! But even she sometimes can’t ‘conquer’ her pain. Sometimes we all need a little help!
Today, mom made the decision to travel in style via ambulance to get easily into the Emergency Room in Vtown. She said the ride was a bit bumpy lying in the back over those wheel wells. Then, she waited patiently for most of the day to hear that she would be admitted into the hospital. They have her pain managed intravenously and she is starting to relax in this noisy place. Whew!
Sexy Neck sent me some interesting reading from the Mayo clinic while I was hanging out with Mama. It is great information about cancer patients and pain. Just a little light reading. 😉
This week, I read a quote in a book that went a little something like this:
We can sit in our pain now and notice it or we can deal with it later. But, we will have to deal with the pain sometime.
My other quote for today: “The well is deep, the scoop strong, and the grip even stronger. Holding on to holding on.”
Noticing.
Strength.
Sitting.
Deepness.
Conquering by being present.
Devastation.
Pain.
F*ck you cancer.
Apparently, I got me some anger today too!
Fifteenth Day of advent and I threw out an F-word.
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PS. M, if you are reading this. All the balls are still in the air. Costco shopping is still suspended. We got our peeps in line. Three week cycle unfolds on the weekend. Trying to contact the other M for pain plan. Having difficulty. Mom will be here a few days. Chemo may be postponed.
Be A Great Friend to my Parents (Advent Day 5)
Happy fifth day of advent. What a beautiful waiting time we are enjoying.
Today, we spent the day in Vernon with my parents. We were blessed to have a visit with our great family friend, Mrs.S.
She came to lighten and brighten mom and dad’s day. She told wonderful stories about her grandchildren, and activities at home. Exactly what mom needed.
Yesterday, mom and dad got a great surprise from a friend from PG that now lives in Vtown. She dropped off a batch of gingerbread cookies, icing and decorations for mom to do with the boys. Every Christmas she has decorated gingerbread cookies with our boys. Here was Mrs. E’s note:
As, I sit on this fifth day of advent I ponder friendship. I think of my mom and dad and the comfort from friends that they have known for a long time. These friends have helped her tremendously through letters, photos, flowers, food and short visits. Mom and dad are very fortunate to have incredible friends.
My only wish for this fifth day of advent as I ponder friendship is that we could add another “F” word to this day – food. I wish we could find something that mom wants to eat. Mom has lost another ten pounds since her surgery. She is down to 131 pounds. Whew, bring on food, friendship and the fifth day of advent.
Be Shaving Mama’s Head
It’s the simple things that are such a gift. Mom being able to get out of her chair without pain. Seeing her reach easily for CC’s hand. And her asking me to shave off the rest of her hair.
Before:
After:
“Oh that feels better!”
Be Rockin’ Chemo #4!
My heart is singing? Can you hear? I definitely make a joyful noise.
Mom had her fourth chemotherapy session at the cancer clinic today. This is four of six and about four weeks after her surgery.
Mom was connected with the pain management specialist in Vtown today and she worked a miracle. (Before I carry on, did you know that most towns have one. You don’t need to live in pain when you are battling cancer!). Anyways, Miss Miller is a nurse as well as a cancer survivor. Today she swooped in like Mary Poppins with her suitcase full of pain and nausea prevention ideas. She said she has even more tricks in her bag if this first plan doesn’t work!
Oh but I think it already is. Here is mom and I hanging out tonight:
Doesn’t my mama look great! She says tomorrow she wants me to shave her head. She is tired of having her hair all over her pillow. Yeah- she ain’t tired from being in pain.
Miracles occur every day!
Filled with gratitude. Filled with love from my bible study sisters Filled with hope.
Be Bike Riding in -10 degrees Celsuis
We’ve had a few hurdles to overcome lately! Do you get that impression?
One of our barriers to jump over has been our cars. More than once in the last few months, I have left my interior light on which has cause my battery to die. Just over a month ago, right before my mom’s surgery in Vancouver, my husband was in a car accident.
This morning we woke up with my husband’s car leaking fluid, probably related to the accident. He then was planning on taking my car, but my car had a dead battery! With stealth speed and a positive attitude, he managed to maneuver his car into position, jump my car and then get to work! Whew!
This left me to first bike ride JC to school, then down the other way to CC’s preschool and now back home. We will do everything in reverse in about an hour.
We did it all with a smile on our faces in the -10° weather.
Here are the boys ready to go:
Here I am on the path to CC’s preschool. CC and OC are in the chariot bike trailer.
All I could thing about as I rode was mom’s words as she walked out of the hospital yesterday and she breathed in the cool crisp air: “ahhhh, that feels good!” I agree Mom!
Be Missing School
Last Wednesday, JC woke up with a bit of a fever, I kept him home!
It was a PJ, truck playing, leaf gathering, door jam hanging, hockey equipment wrestling kind of day.
Today, Nana is getting sprung from the hospital so we are going for a visit.
When deciding on what to do, I often ask myself, “When (insert name of son) is eighteen years old, is this going to matter?”.
A whole day with his brothers and now a day with Nana and Papa, yup these days matter! Sorry school!
"Be" ENOUGH 