In my grief, I am learning to hold captive to every moment. As winter comes to a close here, I decided to take the boys for one more skate on the outdoor rink.
JC and CC loved racing and playing tag. OC took his first tentative steps on his ‘cheese cutter’ skates.
We all had a blast.
Yup, those are boats in the background. We are skating right beside the lake.
CC with a full mask of snow courtesy of his big brother.
I laughed.
I raced.
I am still faster for one more year!
Enjoying the last blast of winter!
Just love this photo…
Love these kids sense of adventure and determination.
I love seeing my boys do something I enjoyed doing in University.
Exposure.
Opportunity.
Determination.
Ringing the bell!
What did you yearn to have in your childhood home?
A cozy place to snuggle and read?
A place to climb?
A home for your dolls and toys?
Since the day we moved into our house last summer, our boys have wanted to build a fort/Maisonnette under the stairs.
A perfect hideaway.
A clubhouse.
A special space.
My heart longs to create a healing home where we can rest. As last week unfolded, I knew our family needed a project for the weekend. I immediately thought of the fort. We must have hit the right moment as the construction gears were in motion on Friday night about ten seconds after I mentioned the fort.
JC and Sexy Neck came up with the design. I cleaned out my stuff from under the stairs. The boys found some wood and they were off.
Here is the finished product on Sunday night:
The boys want to put wood on the sides, add a rope ladder, paint, add a curtain for privacy, a bookshelf and a few more nicknacks will come and go.
The boys were incredible working with their dad. Sexy Neck was amazing at involving the boys every step of the way. The were able to measure and cut wood. Problem solve when the wood wouldn’t fit on the platform. The boys screwed in the floorboard, OC was a natural. Finally, they got to choose everything that they wanted in the fort.
Building self-esteem.
Handwork.
Creating.
Bodies and minds in motion.
Encouraging.
The boys Maisonnette designed and created by them.
Being.
Boys.
Gold medal hockey game.
Last day of the Olympics.
Sochi 2014.
Sunday morning.
Singing O’Canada.
Seeing Sidney Crosby’s triumphant smile.
My comments followed by tears: This is every mother’s dream, that their boys find their passion and follow it.
Hockey.
Ballet.
Drawing.
Guitar.
Skiing.
Swimming.
Be a passionate Crazy Canuck.
We are on a one way track to healing.
Chugging down the track, snotty horns a blaring into my Kleenex.
The rickety old train with its heavier than normal road.
Chugging along.
Not making a stop.
Not picking anything up.
Just chugging along.
You want to get on this train?
Observe carefully.
Run along and jump.
This train can’t stop.
It may never start again.
This train wants to hide in the shed.
But with three wee train cars on the back, there ain’t no rest.
Weekends, the big handsome steam locomotive comes along to give us a pull.
But other than that we are stuck with the dirty, coal steam engine.
Chugging.
On the track.
Teary eyes forward.
Trying hard not to fall off.
Wow, this is one big hill.
“I think I Cann, I think I Cann!”
Strap yourselves in.
Lie down.
Do what you need to do because boy do I have a story for you!
As I write these words I am very conscious that we each have an individual perspective on God, heaven, the meaning of life as well as life after death.
I want to be very clear where I am coming from so that you have a frame of reference for what I am choosing to write. My life is not directed by a church consciousness of God nor is my faith anything miraculous nor profound. My relationship with Jesus started in University in my childhood bedroom, alone with God answering a simple prayer: “God show me you are real.”
This simple prayer followed years of bible study, lukewarm times where I couldn’t see God at work, moments of zealously following God and now this.
This winter season living in a desert while rowing my boat in the ocean of grief. Woah!
Every present God.
Quilt maker sewing good and bad to make a beautiful quilt.
Coincidences that make me take a deep breath.
This one brought goosebumps to my arms.
A few days ago, I was sitting at the kitchen table with the three boys. When we have a quiet moment, this is when someone will usually bring up Nana.
On this day it was two year old, OC. He piped up, out of nowhere and said, “Nana with Boots!”
My ears almost fell off of my head. I immediately looked at JC, our six year old and said, “Do you know who Boots is?”
JC said, “No!”
Our four year old chimed in, “I have boots!”
I then asked OC again, “Who is Nana with?”
He said, “Boots.”
I paused then looked at the boys and told them that Boots was my childhood cat.
They looked at me wide-eyed then we went back to playing Lego.
Grief and God at His best!
All these lovelies where born months apart (coincidently). They are all either 6 years old, 4 years old or 2.
It was beautiful to be reunited with them today.
I also managed to ‘almost’ get a photo of their wonderful parents.
Pure hearts.
Pure joy.
Pure friendship.
Pure love.
"Be" ENOUGH 