Be Existing, Be Okay Today

I exist in a world I never knew nor imagined.

20140119-150216.jpgI ponder my mom’s depth of knowing, her presence in all our lives and her amazing Sunday dinners.

I wait for my mom to walk through door and say, “Hi Joanna!”

I wonder how did she die and really what the hell happened.

I think about snowflakes, butterflies and my mom’s final smile.

20140119-150228.jpgI talk to the people that know our story, my dad, my cousins, my close friends.

I walk away from my old ways, my old complaints, the things that no longer serve me.

I hide from sympathy. I hide from shallow words and frivolous complaints.

I sit still and rest. Feeling my body for the first time in many months.

I watch, I look for some sort of sign. A sign from heaven.

I hover, waiting to see what unfolds.

I know I will be okay today and that is enough!

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2 thoughts on “Be Existing, Be Okay Today”

  1. Love you Honey, Am so thankful that God inspired you to write your Blog.
    It is a blessing to me and soooo many others, too. Ginny

    1. Dearest Ginny, thank you for your kind words. God continues to hold us very close. We are muddling through trying to figure out a new normal. I hope to get back to blogging soon when the fog rises a bit.
      Hugs to you and Wayne and the kids.

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