More about grief if you need it, I sure do!
Daily Archives: January 10, 2014
Be Doing Nothing Special (More Irony)
I ain’t doing nothing special, but God is so present.
I can’t seem to pray or even open my bible or count my thousand gifts.
These rituals used to fill me with joy each morning.
I didn’t do it because someone told me to, I just did it because I could.
Now, I can’t.
I sit in a sacred space.
In grief.
In silence.
Within myself.
God pours himself out.
Through people.
Through nature.
Loudly.
All over and around me.
I watch.
I wait.
I remain open.
To see how he will pick up the broken pieces of my heart and my life.
I receive an email then another.
One says you need to see these lyrics.
Another one says you need to listen to this song.
BOTH SONGS ARE EERILY SIMILAR!
One woman lives in Leduc, the other Oyama.
They don’t even know each other.
How could this be?
God loves.
God lives.
God speaks.
These women listened and acted.
I sure didn’t do anything special.
The irony continues…
Here’s the lyrics and song if you are interested:
The song about oceans…and the lyrics to another song:
In your ocean, I’m ankle deep
I feel the waves crashin’ on my feet
It’s like I know where I need to be
But I can’t figure out, yeah I can’t figure out
Just how much air I will need to breathe
When your tide rushes over me
There’s only one way to figure out
Will ya let me drown, will ya let me drown
Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, ’cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I’m in reach
‘Cause I am down on my knees, I’m waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful
And the water is risin’ quick
And for years I was scared of it
We can’t be sure when it will subside
So I won’t leave your side, no I can’t leave your side
Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, ’cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I’m in reach
‘Cause I am down on my knees, I’m waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful
In a daydream, I couldn’t live like this
I wouldn’t stop until I found something beautiful
When I wake up, I know I will have
No, I still won’t have what I need
Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire, ’cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me, I know that I’m in reach
‘Cause I am down on my knees, I’m waiting for something beautiful
Oh, something beautiful
God will give you more than you can handle: I guarantee it.
We were speaking to my counsellor about this exact sentiment last week.
This post floored me. I had to share.
Just rowing my boat through the ocean of grief.
There’s a certain phrase I’ve come to really dislike.
All my life, I’ve heard this phrase whenever I go through a rough patch. *And by rough patch, I mean a prickly, gnarly patch that leaves me bleeding to near death*. You’re probably familiar with those kinds of “patches”.
“God will never give you more than you can handle” is the phrase I’m referring to.
And it’s a sweet sentiment, really. The people who say it are speaking from caring and concerned hearts.
BUT–it isn’t true.
I know that sounds harsh, but I promise I haven’t suddenly lost my mind or have become an angry-with-God bitter woman who hates the world. Actually, when I realized the simple fact that God can–and will–give us more than we can possibly bear, it got easier.
And it all started to make more sense.
I’ve often trudged through trials that overwhelm me. Ever since my…
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"Be" ENOUGH 