This journey through cancer with my mom has been a rich and horrific time. Watching my mom deal with pain on a daily basis, seeing her fortitude to choke back elephant size pills (we both hate taking pills!) and all of us trying to figure out what to do to help when there is really nothing you can do stretched me beyond my limits most days.

Today, my journey has been to look through old photos to try to remember what my beautiful mom looked like pre-cancer.

The light in my mom’s eyes never faded. They were strong and clear and loving until the last morning when she said, “Hi” to me. Her muscles atrophied and her weight faded, but her determination did not. Every day she set a goal for herself, some days it was just to eat more protein, others it was to put one foot on the floor beside her bed and lastly it was to have that one drink of thirst-quenching water.

What goals do you have for this New Year?

My goals are simple:

– Live one day at a time.

– Look into the eyes around me.

– Live my life with determination, just like my mom.

I love you Mama. I miss you dearly and I can’t imagine my life without you. BUT I have learned a lot from you and I take these things into my new year. I love you Mama. I miss you so much.